Post by The Nickleman on Nov 25, 2022 22:52:24 GMT -5
“Shattered legs may heal in time, but some betrayals fester and poison the soul.”
― George R.R. Martin
A compilation of never-before-seen footage rolls across the screen. We see The Nickleman meeting with Thaddeus Duke in an extravagant office just before his OCW debut. Thaddeus is flashing a gullible smile and offering Nickleman racks of money; Thad clearly needs The Nickleman’s help. We then shift to a clip of Nickleman, Thaddeus Duke, and Cyrus Braddock meeting in a Benihana’s the night before Sahara's championship match against Cypher. Thaddeus is laying out the plan, but Nickleman interrupts him to suggest an even more violent approach. Thaddeus reaches across the table and places a tender hand on Nickleman’s shoulder, thanking him for the help. We then cut to the footage of the Dukes screwing Cypher for the TransAtlantic championship, ending with The Nickleman hitting his trademark Devil Hook Drop on Cypher.
Cutting back to the present day, we see a shot of The Nickleman, dressed in all black, standing at the front gate of a large compound in the Bronx. Bobby Bourbon and Thunder Knuckles flank him on either side while holding gas canisters. All three Bastards are grinning like the dogs they are, clearly up to something sinister. The Nickleman pulls out a cigarette and lights it with a match as TK and Bobby double check that their canisters are full. The camera settles in on this image as The Nickleman takes a long drag of his cancer stick before he turns to address the camera directly.
“You’re probably wondering how we got here, aren’t you?”
Bobby turns to TK and whispers.
“I’m just wondering why he’s wearing all-black…”
“Because this is Sahara Duke’s fucking wake, bro.”
The Nickleman snickered to himself as he exhaled the smoke. The smoke blew madly in the wind, briefly covering up the emblem emblazoned onto the gate. Once the smoke dissipated you could make out the logo with more clarity. The golden emblem on the gate showed a scimitar resting on the head of Pharaoh while a star sparkled below it. For some reason, you recognized this as the logo for the Shriners International, which was formerly known as the Ancient Arabic Order of the Nobles of the Mystic Shrine.
“Where even is -here-?”
TK leaned in to inform Bobby of their location while The Nickleman took another puff of his carcinogen.
“We’re at the big N-Y H-Q for some American Masonic order. Charlie said these guys are in deep with the Dukes and the illuminati..”
“Well….are they?”
TK shrugged nonchalantly while The Nickleman carried on with his rant.
“Probably.”
“The Nickleman was brought into OCW by the Dukes to handle their problems, and now he’s become their biggest problem of all! Ain’t that the shits?”
The Nickleman shook his head with a cocky smirk. He placed a hand on the Shriner compound’s front gate and pushed it open.
“Thaddeus Duke couldn’t take care of a child napper’ himself, and Sahara Duke couldn’t win the TransAtlantic Championship by herself: so they called up The Nickleman to make all their wildest dreams come true. And for the right price, I did.
For a time.”
The Nickleman took another slow drag off his burning carcinogen as he stepped through the open gate and onto the grounds of the lavish estate. Bobby and TK looked to each other for confirmation before following in The Nickleman’s path.
“But the times are a’ changin’. Can’t you smell that scent of soot on the wind? Can’t you see the burning embers swirling in the air? Don’t you know that a new age in OCW has already begun?”
The Nickleman rolled his eyes exaggeratedly.
“How much more obvious need it be? You all should already know exactly what’s about to happen. The Dukes shuffled The Nickleman into the fold and now BOB’s walking away with their whole fucking pot of gold. The Dukes thought The Nickleman would be their ‘trump card’, but it turns out they’re the only ones being played!”
Bobby and TK chuckle as The Nickleman bumps them with his elbows.
“Do the Dukes really think we’re going to let them keep hanging on for the ride? Do the Dukes really think we’ll just let Sahara waltz away from the Premium Live Event with OUR championship gold around her dainty little waist? That’s a cute idea….but it ain’t never gonna fucking happen.”
Bobby and TK shake their heads from side-to-side to signal that they too know it will never happen.
“Sahara Duke just doesn’t have what it takes to be a REAL champion in OCW…the only gold she’s won is the gold that WE gave to her! She couldn’t beat Cypher on her own, so Thad made sure The Nickleman would be there in her corner. But now that Sahara has to go to war with The Nickleman himself….who the fuck is going to be there to win the match for her? We all know it won’t be Thad, because that pussy is scared SHITLESS of fighting me!
I was on the Dukes payroll for long enough. Now, it’s time to make them really pay.”
TK and Bobby grin at Nickleman as they walk behind him and empty out the contents of their gas canisters. The ONLY OCW double-champion takes another drag off his cigarette as the other Bastards do his dirty work.
“We’ve let the Dukes stick around long enough, but now, Sahara’s sticking her nose in our business…so what do you boys say? Is it time to burn that shit off or what?”
Bobby and TK both give Nickleman a thumbs up as they keep pouring the gas out all over the pathway through the compound.
“I’m already pouring the gas!”
“Spark it up, Chuck!”
Them No Good Bastards call out for destruction as The Nickleman flashes an arrogant smirk. He taps the tip of his cigarette, causing the ash to fall to the gasoline-covered ground. Within mere moments the flames overtake your screen as the Bastards all laugh with equal parts malice and merriment. The flames flash to life, ripping fiery waves through the air as they devour all the oxygen around them. The camera zooms in so much that the only thing on your screen is the crackling flames.
As the flames finally dissipate, we fade into another series of compiled clips, starting with Them No Good Bastards first appearance back on Massacre in nearly a year. With our new context in mind, we can see The Nickleman planting the seeds of the Duke's destruction months in advance. We see The Nickleman pinning CJ O’Donnell with Crash’s help, and in the front row we see Bobby and TK wearing t-shirts that read ‘Watch Out Duke’- a clear warning of what is to come.
We quickly cut to a shot of The Nickleman standing in a classroom in front of Crash Rodriguez, lecturing him about Sahara Duke’s in-ring weaknesses while Crash takes dutiful notes. We then see Crash getting a clean win over Sahara Duke on Massacre before cutting to a shot of Crash celebrating with Nickleman backstage. The Nickleman pops a bottle of champagne, spraying it everywhere. We then see him recruiting Thad’s ally, Harmon Egan, into the Brotherhood of Bastards. We then cut to the clip of Harmon Egan submitting Sahara before bouncing backstage once again, where every OCW member of BOB is seen raising their glass in a celebratory toast. The camera fixes on this scene as The Nickleman goes to speak.
“My my my….you boys have fucking done it. What was once considered the ‘Duke stranglehold’ on this company has now been broken, and the funny thing is…we could never have done this without their help! Thaddeus has been sewing the seeds of Sahara’s destruction, and those fucking morons don’t even realize it. When Thaddeus said he needed me to be the Sheriff around here, he had no idea I’d tap my Brothers to be my deputies, and now his rich bitch can’t even BUY a win! We’ve shown the whole world that while the Dukes might own OCW, it’s clearly the BROTHERHOOD that runs this bitch!
We’re playing a game of chess against these idiots and it’s clear that we’ve ALREADY WON- because a ‘Duke’ just can’t beat a ‘Bastard’!”
“I’ll drink to that!”
The Bastards all clink their glasses together before we roll into another video compilation. This time, we see The Nickleman meticulously going through paper reports. We see him throwing graphs and charts all around some sort of home-office, with empty beer cans and half-smoked meth bowls just laying on his desk. It doesn’t seem like he’s making any progress towards his objective. We see a few shots of The Nickleman ripping his hair out of his head before we fade into a shot of The Nickleman, Bobby Bourbon, and Thunder Knuckles all standing around at a 7 Eleven in the middle of the Bronx, with Bobby and TK filling up their gas canisters at the fuel pumps.
It’s pretty obvious this was filmed right before the promo that started this vignette off. TK’s gas canister fills up first, so he takes out the fuel pump and looks over to The Nickleman.
“So….what’s the plan again? You finally figure out where the Dukes stash all their money?”
“It’s simple, Teekz’! I’ve been doing a whole lot of digging through the Duke’s personal finances, I’ve been looking at charts and graphs like some sort of fucking accountant, and I think I’ve finally found their holy fucking grail.”
TK cocks a curious brow towards Nickleman. Meanwhile, Bobby Bourbon is comically struggling to extract the fuel pump from his own canister without much luck.
“What do you mean?”
The Nickleman places one hand on TK's shoulder while using his other hand to make all sorts of wild gesticulations.
“Rich people never just let all their money sit in one place for long, they’re always moving it around and transferring it to accounts and hiding it inside of small nations with poor financial regulations. It was a hell of a bitch to track down…..but I think I finally cracked the code, with no help at all from any of those tax filings you sent me.”
TK takes a step back, looking just a little bit pissed off.
“Dude, do you know how hard it was to get their tax documents? I had to use up all my favors with the IRS to get them to leak the shit to me! And you’re telling me you don’t find anything in there you could use at all? Did you even look at them?”
“I didn’t need to……because I finally figured it all out organically.”
“What do you mean? Did that dumbass actually tell you?”
The Nickleman just shrugged mystically.
“Yeah, something like that…..just rest assured knowing this is as solid a lead as any. That Duke fortune will be ours before the day is out!”
As The Nickleman looks up towards the sky with a conniving smile on his face, we are once again forced to suffer through another compilation clip. Going back to the footage from earlier, we once again see The Nickleman stressing out in front of a slew of tax documents. After some hard cuts and some clear frustration, we see The Nickleman smoking some meth to relax. Then, we see him nodding off in the bathroom, somehow getting himself stuck between the toilet and the wall, before we see him close his eyes and begin daydreaming about the Free Masons.
Suddenly, your screen is overtaken by crackling flames. The inferno rages on for a few more seconds until you see a ton of foam hit the fire, killing it instantly. As the flames die we see a very disgruntled Nickleman, still dressed in all-black, standing right between Bobby and TK. Standing across from the Bastards we see three very old and very short men, all seemingly very white and very wealthy, at least if the Rolexes on their watches are any indication. All three geezers can be seen sporting the legendary ‘Shriner' hats made of red fuzz atop their balding heads. The geezer in the middle goes to speak as he pulls a cellphone out of his pocket.
“We’re going to call the po-lease! You Bastards are sick!”
The Nickleman, somewhat confident that he has warrants out for his arrest, reaches out and tries to grab the Shriner’s phone.
“No, don’t do that!”
The two geezers flanking the primary geezer push The Nickleman back.
“Oh yeah….and why shouldn’t I? You tried to burn down the Shriner headquarters!”
Nickleman, TK, and Bobby all look between each other. It looks like TK and Bobby are expecting Nickleman to speak, because this was all HIS idea, after all….
“Well uhm……..Bobby will suck your dick if you just let us go?”
“WHAT?!?!”
“WHAT?!?!”
The three old geezers all look completely taken aback by the offer, as do Bobby and TK.
“No way Charlie, I’m not doing tha-”
The geezer in the middle is already getting hard at the idea of getting his pickle tickled by one of the top free agent athletes in all of professional wrestling. The Shriner extends his hand out for a shake with a huge smile plastered to his face.
“DEAL!”
The Nickleman excitedly shakes hands with the OG Shriner, seemingly trading away Bobby’s innocence in exchange for one less criminal complaint. The scene fades to black as the other members of BOB look to be completely frozen in shock.
