Post by TheMeccaOfManhood on Sept 7, 2022 14:57:52 GMT -5
*Old Glory waves across the screen. The majestic red, white, and blue fluttering, with drums wrapping out softly in the background give a feeling that even the proudest Antifa member would be filled with a sense of patriotism. The drumming gives way to the sound of a hammer banging against the wood. The stars and bars begin to fade away to an overhead shot of a small construction site. The shot moves in closer to reveal The Marvelous One hammering a board.
His white shirt is covered in sweat, revealing his popping pecs, hey, wet t-shirts don't just work for busty women. While staring at his chest like the pervert you are, you notice it says "Habitat For Humanity" on it. The Bod God drives a nail in with a single swing of his hammer and then steps back to admire his work.
The Mecca of Manhood wipes the sweat from his brow and says, "Simply Marvelous".
The President of Pump just so happens to notice the camera and turns to face it. With a smile, the Big Natty Daddy places the hammer into his tool belt that hugs his hips in a way Sahara fantasizes about at night while some two-pump-chump wiggles around on top of her. *
Hello Constituents, as you can see The Marvelous One is out here putting in the work, and putting his money where his mouth is to MAKE AMERICA MARVELOUS!
Unlike The Strader Clan who only put their mouths where the money is. But they are Canadians, and while many other politicians think it is our neighbors to the south who have been damaging America, I know for a fact it is the Canadians. They blatantly imitate America and do a very poor imitation at that. The CFL, Canadian Bacon, sketchy comedy shows Niagara Falls, and don't even get me started on their music.
However, I'm not here to talk about how bad Canada is, they speak for themselves on that account. Verbally tearing down another country will do nothing to M.A.M, Make America Marvelous. No, that starts at home, not MY home specifically, because it is amazingly marvelous, I'm referring to the home of the general we, America.
As you can see, I'm here building a home for a single mother who couldn't keep her legs closed in some trap house, and had more than just a needle shoved into her.
*In the background of the shot, a woman is walking by and hears what The Titan of Tenacity is saying. She is clearly shocked as she freezes in place with her jaw hanging open. The Bod God feels her eyes on him and looks over his shoulder to see her.
The Mecca of Manhood flashes his pearly whites at her and then moves to stand beside her. TM1 put his arm around her, never offering to take the 2x4 from her hands. *
This is the poor unfortunate, unwed, uneducated, and unkempt woman for whom I'm single-handedly building this house.
*The woman looks around at all the other people working on the house, and then down at the board still in her hands that The President of Pump hasn't helped with. *
This poor lady has never had anyone to show her a life that could be considered Marvelous. This poor woman has never known anything but poverty and despair in her life. She, like so many other Americans, needs someone to take her under their wing and show her that life can be so much more.
With the right mentor, a proper work ethic, some education, diet, exercise, and the right leadership in the White House, this unfortunate soul could achieve financial milestones she otherwise would have never imagined. If I'm elected….
No.
WHEN!
When I am elected I will take a sink or swim approach to individuals like this lady here. I will cut Welfare, disability, and SSI. These people will have to learn to be productive members of society. I will force the lazy and unproductive to find their inner Mecca of Manhood, or well, in this case, Mecca of Womanhood. They will have no option but to pull themselves up by their bootstraps.
*The Abdominal Adonis squeezes the woman tighter in the side hug and looks down at her with a growing smile. She looks up at him with a look of shock and disgust. The Bod God shoots her a wink and looks back at the camera. *
This is what building back better really looks like. When the White House is turned into the Mecca of Manhood, people just like this lady here will be forced from poverty, and may even achieve middle-class status.
*The King of Quads looks back at her, but her eyes have never left his face. *
Just imagine everything you'll accomplish when I'm in office. Just imagine, you could afford the internet. You could actually pay for your streaming subscriptions and not bum Netflix and Hulu passwords from hard-working taxpayers. I even bet that if you put in some overtime you could afford a certified pre-owned vehicle and maybe even an above-ground pool. No more J.D. Byrider or public pools at community centers for you.
*The woman lets out a frustrated grunt and drops the board. The 2x4 lands right on Triple M's toes. *
AAAAGGGGHHH!!!
*The Emperor of Ego begins hopping on one foot while holding his now injured foot. The frustrated woman has had all she can take of the Miami Muscle Machine and storms off.
The Marvelous One stops hopping up and down as he gingerly puts his foot down. He watches the woman walk away, and slowly shakes his head. *
Unfortunately, some people are comfortable in their mediocrity. Comfort is a slow death, and only through being uncomfortable can you grow. If you refuse to grow, if you refuse to become Marvelous, well then, we'll just send you to Canada with the rest of the underachieving schmucks.
Vote Mason 2024, to Make America Marvelous.
*The political ad commercial fades away and the OCW cameras immediately start rolling. The Mecca of Manhood takes his tool belt off and lays it upon a sawhorse. The Bod God pulls his shirt off revealing his glistening torso and you can audibly hear women begin to ovulate as he wrings the sweat from his shirt before tossing it onto the saw horse with his belt.
The Commander and Chief of Chiseled Physics picks up a 2x6 board and begins examining it. *
You know Diana, you are a real carpenter's dream. Flat as a board, and never been screwed. At Massacre though, you will get laid. You'll get lifted up over my head and laid down with a mighty slam as I deliver Simply Marvelous upon you and snap your little back.
*The Hardbody Handyman releases the board and it immediately falls flat onto the ground. The Bod God shakes his head in disappointment at the board before looking back to the camera. *
Diana, another way you are like a board is that you cannot stand on your own. You need other stiff boards around you to hold you up. You lean on others to support you and make you stronger, instead of standing strong on your own two feet. You are someone that I will probably help build a home for in a year or two, just like the poor unfortunate woman I am serving today. The Mecca of Manhood on the other hand, well the Marvelous One will kick his two feet up on his chaise lounge in his massively marvelous mansion.
*The Big Natty Daddy steps to the side and picks up a 6x6 board and looks it over, and then begins to curl it. The Bishop of Biceps gets a wicked pump and looks quite vascular as his muscles swell. *
The Marvelous One knows all about laying the big wood, and he knows all about being the weight-bearing beam that holds everything together. I held together the two-time NCAA champion Miami Hurricanes, I held together the IBFF when I was sweeping the Olympias, and now I'm an unbeat6 professional wrestler who has never been pinned or submitted.
You may think I was submitted by Hemorrhoid Egan, but like people betting on Dirty Diana to win this match, you're wrong. I didn't tap out, I saw a spider crawling on the mat. I know how afraid of spiders Fluff is, so I was smashing it, so as to not distract Fluff. But, just like Hemorrhoid, and Dirty Diana, Fluff is a brain-dead moron who wouldn't know what being Marvelous meant if his life depended on it.
That is why, when I am elected President I will replace not only the OCW officials but all sports officials with government-tested and appointed officials. All part of a plan to Make America Marvelous.
*The Messiah of Muscle drops the board, taking care to toss it in front of his feet. He then steps up onto the board as a bit of a platform. *
Diana, once more I draw a correlation between you and a board. You, like this beam, will be a step upon which I stand to go higher and higher. Look at the state of OCW, it is in shambles. With worse leadership than the White House and more infighting than the Senate, OCW is heading down the toilet faster than a pre-workout dump. This place needs real leadership, it needs someone to make it Marvelous.
Who better to do that than the Marvelous One?
I will pull OCW up by their bootstraps because Dean couldn't, Marcus Welsh couldn't, Mike Zybala couldn't, and Thaddeus Duke can't do it either. So, The Bod God will take the weight of OCW upon his shoulders and carry it to the top of the sports and, or entertainment world. However, just like some citizens may be lost when I Make America Marvelous, sacrifices may have to be made to make OCW Marvelous.
Diana, you will be one of those sacrifices. You will be some of the extra fat that is trimmed away. I don't mean literal fat, you're only a hundred and fifteen pounds for crying out loud, there really should be weight minimums in this sport, because Diana ain't nothing but a little peanut, and at Massacre, I'm going to bust a nut.
*Another volunteer who was walking past in the background begins to chuckle. The Mecca of Manhood looks over his shoulder at him and the volunteer runs off. *
Diana Watts needs to connect the dots. You can't hit heavy squats. Only here cause you swallow whole brats. You ain't even a pennies worth of T.H.O.T. Probably got your spot through a casting lot. You're going to be a limited appearance, like a Marvel One-Shot. Thinking changing your look will earn you the top spot. Na girl, you just missed the plot.
*The Deltoid Deity steps down from the 6x6 as his cocky grin changes to a stern look. *
Dirty Diana, I'm cleaning house and it's time to take the trash out. I'm building my empire back bigger and better. I will surpass all expectations, even with those expectations set at the highest level possible. I will show everyone why I am….
SIMPLY MARVELOUS!
*Climax. *