Post by Bob Grenier on Apr 15, 2014 23:59:22 GMT -5
(After a failed potential debut, and a near fatal overdose in his hotel room in Pocatello, Bob Grenier has retreated to his old family farm house in Iroquois Falls, Ontario Canada. Iriquois falls is on the outskirts of Timmins, Home to about 200 people. This is somewhere he has not been in 20 years. It's mid April and there is still a chill in the air and snow on the ground. Bob Grenier sits in the dilapidated garage on a tractor tire looking at his hospital bracelet. He is surrounded by old farm equipment, a 1920s John Deere Tractor and many rusted tools. There is a knock on the door and a mysterious woman enters.)
Woman: Been 3 years since anybody been here, Been 20 since we seen you Bob. Figured I drop in here make sure you weren't thieving from old Jimmy's garage.
Bob: Do I know you?
Woman: Probably not, but I know you. Sylvie Lavalee from down the way, and I knew you as a youngster, you and your brothers and sister, used to fish down by the creek at my place. We are all real sorry about the accident. Always hoped you would maybe drop by and see us sometime. You gonna be staying for awhile? Last we all heard you were wrestling, and then just gave it up after the accident.
Bob: When they all died, I felt I died along with them. All I wanted to do was expire for the longest time, but now after the events of this week, Getting an offer. I really think I want to live.
(Sylvie scans the garage and spots a rusted old horseshoe hanging on the wall. She takes it down and hands it to Bob, smiling as she does.)
Sylvie: Consider yourself lucky to be here, and still breathing on this beautiful planet. You are welcome by my place any time my son. You are home now. When you think you have no hope, and you think you are alone, think of this small community. We are your family Bob.
Bob: Thank You.
(She is a frumpy old woman, wearing a greasy white apron, with greying hair and a moustache but at this moment in time, to Bob Grenier she may as well be the most beautiful woman in the world. Bob clutches the horseshoe and they laugh)
Sylvie: So, You are still doing the wrestling thing huh? Big comeback in the works?
Bob: Would hardly call it big. My Debut match is the opening match of the card, in an Airport Hangar in New Mexico against a midget. His name is Keg, from the Brewery and I am an alcoholic. It's like some kind of fucking Joke Sylvie.
Sylvie: Well, You gotta start somewhere. What kind of Circus are you working for anyway?
Bob: You want the rundown? Keg the Midget, A bunch of chicks, a rodeo clown named Richard and Ehud of Moab, an 80 year old man.
(Sylvie looks at him wide eyed. She is in shock and smiling from ear to ear.)
Sylvie: THE Ehud of Moab?
Bob: There's more than one?
Sylvie: My daddy was a law man, and Moab Utah is our sister city. He used to put me to bed at night with stories of Ehud of Moab, busting up criminals with nothing but his bare hands. He'd get up 4 am to milk his cows and feed his chickens, By 5 he'd be scrubbing the sidewalk with a toothbrush and by 6 am he'd be walking his beat. Ehud of Moab is legendary in these parts.
(They both have a good laugh at this. It's definitely a small world after all.)
Sylvie: So, Are you going to go through with it?
Bob: I just don't know. I have reservations about getting in the ring and decapitating a midget. I hear those people have brittle bones. I wouldn't want to hurt the little guy. On the flip side I want to make an impact. I want to be at the top of the card. I just don't want to be known as the guy who maimed a midget in the ring. It just seems to easy.
Sylvie: Don't under estimate the little people Bobby. They are tough. Never under estimate the little people. If you want to talk to one first hand, There is a man who lives in the woods behind your house. He lives in a little shack. He is a retired midget wrestler by the name of Little Canada. Go there Bob and talk to him. He will give you his blessing, and let you know that in the spirit on competition, it is ok to smash a little person. Be warned though, on your travels you will first run into Trapper John. Trapper John will show you the way. I will let him know of your impending arrival.
(Sylvie and Bob share an embrace before she leaves. Bob looks happier than he has been in quite some time. Knowing there are still a couple of people around him who know him and have been thinking of him makes all the difference in the world in regards to his outlook on life. Sylvie quickly leaves the garage and Bob leaves behind her. He crosses the property and makes his way into the dusty old house, family pictures and spider webs line the walls. Bob makes his way into a bedroom and opens up a dresser drawer. He spots an old compass and places it in his pocket, along with a pocket knife. He pulls on one of his Grandfathers old flannel shirts and makes his way to the kitchen. After filling a canteen with water he proceeds to walk out the back door and into the woods behind the house.)
(After Walking for about 30 minutes Bob comes into a clearing, a campfire roars and old man is asleep on a chair beside a canvas military tent. Various pelts hang on a clothesline behind him. Bob inches in closer and the man jumps up and points his shotgun right at Bob's face)
Trapper John: Them's my pelts and this time you ain't takin em' and If you so much as take one more step, I'm a put a hole in your fuckin face, ya hear me?
Bob: Sylvie Lavalee from down the way, she told me come see you. I'm Bob Grenier. I'm searching for Little Canada.
Trapper John: Little Bob Grenier? Jimmy's grandson? Why, I ain't see you in 20 years. Sylvie did mention you were coming. I'm pushing 80 here son. I forgot. Forgive me and my trigger finger. You almost caught a shotgun blast kiddo.
(He laughs hysterically like this is funny. Trapper John is a short fat man who has survived on his camp in the woods for 50 years. He Is balding with hair little hair that sticks up around the sides. He is missing most of his teeth and has a crooked nose. He seems to be cooking up a mess of squirrels in a pot on his camp fire. This is living off the land.)
Trapper John: What do you want with Little Canada? He is a wise little man. It's quite the journey. About 4 more hours east of here, you'll find him.
Bob: I'm having reservations about this wrestling match I'm supposed to have with a midget. He's a short little dwarf and I'm having second thoughts. I am seeking Little Canada's blessing. I don't want to hurt this man. I just need to know that it is ok.
Trapper John: RESERVATIONS? If you really have the backwoods Grenier blood. There should be no reservations about fighting anyone. Women, Children, Midgets, The Crippled. Your old granddad would go down to the local tavern, shoot his mouth off to just about anyone. This place used to be a hell of a town until old Ehud of Moab came down one Summer by request of the Timmins sheriff, ran out all the criminals. Now for the past 40 years it's been pretty quiet... Sorry I'm getting off topic.. Old man tends to ramble sometimes.. A little taken aback too.. Don't get many visitors.. Squirrel??
(He holds out an offering of Squirrel meat and Bob refuses.)
Trapper John: My son, You cannot visit Little Canada, without bringing him a gift. Here take him this.
(Trapper John takes a rabbit pelt off the clothesline and hands it to Bob. Bob stares at it and back at Trapper John. Not knowing what to think.)
Bob: What will he need this for?
Trapper John: I don't know. Perhaps he can use it as a hat? Just go my son. Bring Little Canada this rabbit carcass and let him enlighten you with his wise words. I will let him know of your arrival.
(Bob takes the rabbit and shakes Trapper Johns hand before continuing on his journey to seek a blessing from Little Canada. He disappears into the woods.)
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(Bob has been walking in the woods for 4 hours. The sun is going down but a little bit of sunlight still peaks through the trees. He comes upon a rundown old shack. Beside the shack is a makeshift chicken coop, but these chickens are clearly malnourished. Bob slowly walks up to the shack and knocks on the door. A frail old voice is barely audible.)
Little Canada: Come in.
(Bob pushes open the falling apart wooden door and a small old man, about 90 years old is sitting at a rotting wooden table. He looks to be about 3 feet tall with a wrinkled face. He is completely bald and squints as he looks at Bob. He resembles Elmer Fudd)
Little Canada: You must be Bob. Trapper John mentioned you were on your way. Sit down. Sit down. I cannot see you. But I can smell you. You are definitely bringing the funk. Have you showered today?
Bob: Sorry about that, I've been walking all day.
Little Canada: I kid. How can we live life happily. Without the occasional joke. Did you bring, The Rabbit Pelt?
(Bob hands him the pelt and he immediately puts it on his head and wears it like a hat. They both immediately share a laugh)
Little Canada: So I'm being told you are having certain feelings about wrestling a midget? What seems to be the problem?
Bob: Well, I don't want to start my career off as the guy who jerks the curtain against midgets. I don't want to hurt the guy. I don't feel as though I can climb into the ring and wrestle a little person.
Little Canada: Bob, Don't underestimate us little people. We have a life expectancy that is very short, but I am sitting here at 90 years old, and I think I could kick your ass. My feet are like solid brass, sitting at the end of my stumpy legs. Midgets can be dangerous.
(Bob Grenier has his head on the table and is shaking with laughter. Little Canada is just grinning from ear to ear.)
Little Canada: You laugh. I'm glad. Let me tell you a story. I was once wrestling in Alberta Canada, this was sometime in the 1930's. They had me wrestle a bear.
Bob: How did that go?
Little Canada: I'm still here, aren't I?
(Little Canada flexes his little muscles and shows Bob a scar on his stomach. It appears to be scratches consistent with a bear paw)
Little Canada: Never underestimate the power of positive thinking Bob. If you let your guard down, It does not matter who the opponent is, you will lose. Wrestle the midget Bob. I'm sure he has it in his head that he is going to beat you. You should do the same. You have nothing to worry about. You have my blessing. Wrestle and Flourish Boy.
(He wipes his hand across Bob's cheek, like that creepy scene from Stephen King's Thinner. Bob looks at him oddly and they both laugh and continue to talk.)
Little Canada: Bob, For a good life you just have to weaken, and find somewhere to go. Go somewhere you are needed and find somewhere to grow.
Bob: Did you just quote the Tragically Hip?
Little Canada: Yes, I did. Gord Downie comes to see me often. When he's feeling his anxiety. I wrote the lyrics to Ahead by a Century you know. He'll never admit to it though... Welcome Home Bobby. Welcome Home. Now without anymore hesitation, go kick some midget ass.
(Bob Grenier and Little Canada continue to share laughs and conversate. Bob Grenier will make his OCW debut at Monday Night Massacre. Not a grand debut but a debut none the less. Pretty good for a guy who almost died less than 2 days ago.)