Post by Marcus Welsh on Apr 20, 2022 1:26:25 GMT -5
OOC: Thought this might deserve it's own thread since it's, ya know, the major story heading into Sunday.
It felt like we’d been walking for days. Probably because we had. There was this incredible weight holding me down. Literally. Greg leaned against my back, relying on me to get him to where we were going.
WHEREVER THAT MAY BE
We’d been captured. Captured with a capital “FUCK”. Apparently there were natives on this island. Natives far larger in numbers than we’d been led to believe. Natives with attitude. Natives with island pride.
Unbeknownst toward our accidental visit, they’d left us alone.
Then came the fire.
A smokey, orange alarm. It caught their attention and down from their village they came to investigate.
What they found drew their ire AND their spears.
Now? Now we pay the price. We are at their mercy. We do what they say in the hopes we live to starve another day.
“Call him,” Leo urged, loud enough to hear, quiet enough to not arouse our captors.
“Not yet,” I replied, dragging Greg and kicking at a snake in my path.
“Sir, I hate to interject in business that isn’t mind but I suggest you call him,” Knife Man backed Leo up.
I didn’t want to hear it, so I picked up my pace.
“CALL HIM, SIR!”
The natives looked at us. We all stopped. I was sure we were dead. The good captain, anyway. But once they saw there was no imminent threat of escape, they continued to lead us to...somewhere.
“Guys, listen, they may be taking us to safety, alright?”
They didn’t buy it. And, I can’t really blame them. I didn’t buy it either.
I was sure of one thing.
I did not want to use that cell phone. Even if it meant an instant escape from the island, I knew what it meant for OCW. I knew what it meant for my pride. It was the absolute last resort.
Despite our predicament, we hadn’t fallen that far. Not yet.
Up to that point we’d traversed charred remnants of a once beautiful, lush jungle. Smoldering and shriveled carcasses began to appear. Carcasses belonging to animals and humans. The tension thickened. These overcooked bodies belonged to friends of those holding us captive.
A native behind us yelled out a war cry before stabbing a low level OCW employee. I think his name was Eric. But it might also have been Bobby. Then again, it could have been Ian. His name was no longer of concern as his guts spilled all over the burned ground.
Other natives rushed toward the attacker to calm him down. We served a purpose. We weren’t meant to be killed until that purpose was served.
Our procession continued. All OCW eyes were on me. The golden phone, in my pocket, had never felt heavier. I kept my eyes on the ground, focused on maintaining my pride as our fearless leader. I would see us through this.
We continued on. Only the sizzling sound of death surrounding us. Back in February we wrestled in Death Valley. Now? Now we were walking through a literal valley of death.
“Look!” Leo pointed.
Look I did. Green trees. A lush jungle. The valley of death was giving way to life. As it turns out, the island was much bigger than we’d anticipated.
We reached the end of our ashy destruction and stood at the precipice of creation.
The native leading the way stepped into the trees and, one by one, we followed.
My muscles relaxed. My heart rate slowed. I started to feel as though things might be okay.
~Our view pans over the cavalcade of captives and turns, toward the fresh, new jungle. Miles of foliage lay waiting for them with a giant hill, a small mountain, covered in bush and trees. Beyond that? I guess we’ll find out~
“AHHHH!” another nameless OCW employee screamed after being bitten in the neck by a giant mosquito. It didn’t take long for his face to blow up, his knees to give out, and his body to cease operation.
In short, the jungle wasn’t much better than the VALLEY OF DEATH.
It didn’t help that we were marching at an incline. A never ending hill with shaky, slippery footing. The natives traversed it with ease, sneering whenever one of us would shrill with peril, seeing our life hanging in the balance.
How foolish I was, thinking the beginning of the jungle was a portal into a safe, secure realm.
The longer this goes, the worse it gets.
An uptick in the islanders voices indicated, to me, that we might be nearing a checkpoint of sorts. An end to this horrific journey.
I allow myself to relax, for just a moment.
That was a mistake.
The Earth got angry. The skies roared as the ground shook. Quickly, everybody reached for the nearest branch, stump, root...a wooden preserver to keep us from sinking into the sharp, treacherouss abyss.
Except for the natives. They dropped to their hands and knees to pray. It was the first time since they emerged that I’d seen them lose control. Equanimity eviscerated. They showed fear.
One arm around Greg and the other clutching to a tree trunk, I knew I couldn’t hold out much longer. Judging by the faces of those around me, neither could they.
And, just as quickly as it started, it came to an end. The natives stood, regaining their composure. Using their spears, they poked and prodded us back up and on the march.
Spears weren’t the only thing poking at me. The glares, visual daggers hurled at my back from every.single.member of the OCW family. All furious over my inaction. All weighing the pros and cons of taking the phone from my pocket and dialing the number for themselves.
Mutiny was on the horizon. A desperate idea seconds away from becoming a devastating reality.
And then, apex.
We reached the summit of our climb. The ground leveled off. I dragged Greg along, pulling and pushing my way through the foliage until I stood, overlooking their civilization. An entire community of natives living their best lives.
The ocean stood far off in the distance. Just behind a massive volcano, smoldering. The fuckin thing looked active.
“Well, that explains the tremors.”
Beneath our feet, a trail down into their village. Huts and tree houses. Meager but effective. And, at the center of it all, a giant coliseum built for entertainment. A huge, round, black structure with stacked, stadium seating. An open arena with a sandy surface.
We are who we are, at our core. And, thus, my mind began to envision an event. Our event. Technical Difficulties within that arena.
We just had to make it that far.
In Classic OCW fashion, we lost more unknown employees going down the hill than up it. Some people just can’t handle prosperity.
I’d lost count of the fatalities by that point. To be honest, I was shocked we had so many employees nobody cared about. Seemed to be an endless stock.
The hiring department is going to be busy as fuck when we get back.
Communication wasn’t gonna be fun, what with dealing with people who’d lived on an island their entire lives. Kinda like discussing world views with someone in Mississippi. But, we had to try.
“Or you could just use the golden phone!” Leo shouted.
Did he have a wire into my brain? Sure as shit felt like it.
“Halt!” a voice shouted. It wasn’t one I was familiar with.
Emerging from a hut was a man wearing a purge mask. Yes, a purge mask. How ironic, DON’T YA THINK?
Stepping forward, he eyed me...at least, I think he did. He was wearing a mask, after all.
“So, you’re the ones who have upset Frank.”
“Frank?”
He threw a thumb over his shoulder at the very active, very smokey volcano.
“That’s our god. We call him Frank. He’s mad, as you can see.”
I’m not sure what surprised me most...that this guy could speak perfect english or that they decided to name their god ‘Frank’.
“You speak english?”
The purge mask leaned in, “Yes. Yes I do.”
“How?”
He slapped me across the head, “I was taught it in school, ya big dummy.”
Geezus, that was a little rough. And, kinda embarrassing. But I was in no position to express either of those sentiments.
“So, what are you doing here?”
“Well, it goes like this…”
And so he proceeded to give us this really long winded story about how forty years ago he and a bunch of other male students were flying to ‘Australia’ for a school field trip when their plane went down and they were all stranded on the island. It was a real Lord of the Flies situation. They even slaughtered the fat kid.
They managed. They thrived. And now, they were the proud leaders of a very big, very healthy civilization.
“So, wait, you said you were all boys?”
“Yes. The mighty Muskrats of Milftown.”
A few OCW staffers giggled. Hey, it’s in our nature to laugh at stuff like MILF.
“Sooo...how did, ya know, how did you guys reproduce so many offspring?”
He leaned in and whispered into my ear, “Life finds a way.” He proceeded to slide his mask to the side and lick my ear, sucking on the lobe. Greg woke up.
“HEY!”
“Easy, Greg,” I calmed him down.
Mask back in place, he stood up and said very matter-of-factly, “Okay, so since you guys pissed off Frank we’re gonna have to sacrifice you all to make him happy. Otherwise, ya know…” he leaned in, “Boom.”
Panic set in. The OCW employees heard that and the ones who didn’t reacted to the panic they were witnessing by the ones who did. It was time for me, their fearless leader, to do something. I reached into my pocket and felt the golden phone of salvation. But, I dared not use it. Instead, I called out, “SIR!”
He spun around, that awful mask facing me. “It’s Chief, but I’ll allow it.”
“Might I offer an alternative suggestion?”
He scratched his nuts, “I doubt it. Frank is very angry. Angrier than I’ve ever seen him.”
“Well, where we come from..ya know, the good ole US of A. We’re entertainers. The greatest entertainers in the WORLD. Now, I know you guys are plenty satisfied with what you’ve built here. But wouldn’t you like for us to put on a show that will entertain you all and, possibly, appease Frank? Make the big guy happy MINUS the bloodshed?”
“Hmm,” his arms folded. “I don’t know. We really like blood sacrificing things.”
“Trust me. This will be SO much better. And, hey, if we fail to entertain, you can slaughter us anyway!”
I felt the cringe behind me.
His head tilted. “Ya know, that’s a pretty impossible deal to pass up. Alright, we’ll take you guys to the Coliseum of Frank. You’ll put on your show. If Frank is happy then you guys can, I don’t know, live or whatever. But, if Frank isn’t satisfied...there will be blood.”
I mean, I had to accept. It was take the deal or die instantly. So, I shook hands with the purge masked man and bought us some additional time.
It felt like we’d been walking for days. Probably because we had. There was this incredible weight holding me down. Literally. Greg leaned against my back, relying on me to get him to where we were going.
WHEREVER THAT MAY BE
We’d been captured. Captured with a capital “FUCK”. Apparently there were natives on this island. Natives far larger in numbers than we’d been led to believe. Natives with attitude. Natives with island pride.
Unbeknownst toward our accidental visit, they’d left us alone.
Then came the fire.
A smokey, orange alarm. It caught their attention and down from their village they came to investigate.
What they found drew their ire AND their spears.
Now? Now we pay the price. We are at their mercy. We do what they say in the hopes we live to starve another day.
“Call him,” Leo urged, loud enough to hear, quiet enough to not arouse our captors.
“Not yet,” I replied, dragging Greg and kicking at a snake in my path.
“Sir, I hate to interject in business that isn’t mind but I suggest you call him,” Knife Man backed Leo up.
I didn’t want to hear it, so I picked up my pace.
“CALL HIM, SIR!”
The natives looked at us. We all stopped. I was sure we were dead. The good captain, anyway. But once they saw there was no imminent threat of escape, they continued to lead us to...somewhere.
“Guys, listen, they may be taking us to safety, alright?”
They didn’t buy it. And, I can’t really blame them. I didn’t buy it either.
I was sure of one thing.
I did not want to use that cell phone. Even if it meant an instant escape from the island, I knew what it meant for OCW. I knew what it meant for my pride. It was the absolute last resort.
Despite our predicament, we hadn’t fallen that far. Not yet.
Up to that point we’d traversed charred remnants of a once beautiful, lush jungle. Smoldering and shriveled carcasses began to appear. Carcasses belonging to animals and humans. The tension thickened. These overcooked bodies belonged to friends of those holding us captive.
A native behind us yelled out a war cry before stabbing a low level OCW employee. I think his name was Eric. But it might also have been Bobby. Then again, it could have been Ian. His name was no longer of concern as his guts spilled all over the burned ground.
Other natives rushed toward the attacker to calm him down. We served a purpose. We weren’t meant to be killed until that purpose was served.
Our procession continued. All OCW eyes were on me. The golden phone, in my pocket, had never felt heavier. I kept my eyes on the ground, focused on maintaining my pride as our fearless leader. I would see us through this.
We continued on. Only the sizzling sound of death surrounding us. Back in February we wrestled in Death Valley. Now? Now we were walking through a literal valley of death.
“Look!” Leo pointed.
Look I did. Green trees. A lush jungle. The valley of death was giving way to life. As it turns out, the island was much bigger than we’d anticipated.
We reached the end of our ashy destruction and stood at the precipice of creation.
The native leading the way stepped into the trees and, one by one, we followed.
My muscles relaxed. My heart rate slowed. I started to feel as though things might be okay.
~Our view pans over the cavalcade of captives and turns, toward the fresh, new jungle. Miles of foliage lay waiting for them with a giant hill, a small mountain, covered in bush and trees. Beyond that? I guess we’ll find out~
∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞
“AHHHH!” another nameless OCW employee screamed after being bitten in the neck by a giant mosquito. It didn’t take long for his face to blow up, his knees to give out, and his body to cease operation.
In short, the jungle wasn’t much better than the VALLEY OF DEATH.
It didn’t help that we were marching at an incline. A never ending hill with shaky, slippery footing. The natives traversed it with ease, sneering whenever one of us would shrill with peril, seeing our life hanging in the balance.
How foolish I was, thinking the beginning of the jungle was a portal into a safe, secure realm.
The longer this goes, the worse it gets.
An uptick in the islanders voices indicated, to me, that we might be nearing a checkpoint of sorts. An end to this horrific journey.
I allow myself to relax, for just a moment.
That was a mistake.
The Earth got angry. The skies roared as the ground shook. Quickly, everybody reached for the nearest branch, stump, root...a wooden preserver to keep us from sinking into the sharp, treacherouss abyss.
Except for the natives. They dropped to their hands and knees to pray. It was the first time since they emerged that I’d seen them lose control. Equanimity eviscerated. They showed fear.
One arm around Greg and the other clutching to a tree trunk, I knew I couldn’t hold out much longer. Judging by the faces of those around me, neither could they.
And, just as quickly as it started, it came to an end. The natives stood, regaining their composure. Using their spears, they poked and prodded us back up and on the march.
Spears weren’t the only thing poking at me. The glares, visual daggers hurled at my back from every.single.member of the OCW family. All furious over my inaction. All weighing the pros and cons of taking the phone from my pocket and dialing the number for themselves.
Mutiny was on the horizon. A desperate idea seconds away from becoming a devastating reality.
And then, apex.
We reached the summit of our climb. The ground leveled off. I dragged Greg along, pulling and pushing my way through the foliage until I stood, overlooking their civilization. An entire community of natives living their best lives.
The ocean stood far off in the distance. Just behind a massive volcano, smoldering. The fuckin thing looked active.
“Well, that explains the tremors.”
Beneath our feet, a trail down into their village. Huts and tree houses. Meager but effective. And, at the center of it all, a giant coliseum built for entertainment. A huge, round, black structure with stacked, stadium seating. An open arena with a sandy surface.
We are who we are, at our core. And, thus, my mind began to envision an event. Our event. Technical Difficulties within that arena.
We just had to make it that far.
In Classic OCW fashion, we lost more unknown employees going down the hill than up it. Some people just can’t handle prosperity.
I’d lost count of the fatalities by that point. To be honest, I was shocked we had so many employees nobody cared about. Seemed to be an endless stock.
The hiring department is going to be busy as fuck when we get back.
Communication wasn’t gonna be fun, what with dealing with people who’d lived on an island their entire lives. Kinda like discussing world views with someone in Mississippi. But, we had to try.
“Or you could just use the golden phone!” Leo shouted.
Did he have a wire into my brain? Sure as shit felt like it.
“Halt!” a voice shouted. It wasn’t one I was familiar with.
Emerging from a hut was a man wearing a purge mask. Yes, a purge mask. How ironic, DON’T YA THINK?
Stepping forward, he eyed me...at least, I think he did. He was wearing a mask, after all.
“So, you’re the ones who have upset Frank.”
“Frank?”
He threw a thumb over his shoulder at the very active, very smokey volcano.
“That’s our god. We call him Frank. He’s mad, as you can see.”
I’m not sure what surprised me most...that this guy could speak perfect english or that they decided to name their god ‘Frank’.
“You speak english?”
The purge mask leaned in, “Yes. Yes I do.”
“How?”
He slapped me across the head, “I was taught it in school, ya big dummy.”
Geezus, that was a little rough. And, kinda embarrassing. But I was in no position to express either of those sentiments.
“So, what are you doing here?”
“Well, it goes like this…”
And so he proceeded to give us this really long winded story about how forty years ago he and a bunch of other male students were flying to ‘Australia’ for a school field trip when their plane went down and they were all stranded on the island. It was a real Lord of the Flies situation. They even slaughtered the fat kid.
They managed. They thrived. And now, they were the proud leaders of a very big, very healthy civilization.
“So, wait, you said you were all boys?”
“Yes. The mighty Muskrats of Milftown.”
A few OCW staffers giggled. Hey, it’s in our nature to laugh at stuff like MILF.
“Sooo...how did, ya know, how did you guys reproduce so many offspring?”
He leaned in and whispered into my ear, “Life finds a way.” He proceeded to slide his mask to the side and lick my ear, sucking on the lobe. Greg woke up.
“HEY!”
“Easy, Greg,” I calmed him down.
Mask back in place, he stood up and said very matter-of-factly, “Okay, so since you guys pissed off Frank we’re gonna have to sacrifice you all to make him happy. Otherwise, ya know…” he leaned in, “Boom.”
Panic set in. The OCW employees heard that and the ones who didn’t reacted to the panic they were witnessing by the ones who did. It was time for me, their fearless leader, to do something. I reached into my pocket and felt the golden phone of salvation. But, I dared not use it. Instead, I called out, “SIR!”
He spun around, that awful mask facing me. “It’s Chief, but I’ll allow it.”
“Might I offer an alternative suggestion?”
He scratched his nuts, “I doubt it. Frank is very angry. Angrier than I’ve ever seen him.”
“Well, where we come from..ya know, the good ole US of A. We’re entertainers. The greatest entertainers in the WORLD. Now, I know you guys are plenty satisfied with what you’ve built here. But wouldn’t you like for us to put on a show that will entertain you all and, possibly, appease Frank? Make the big guy happy MINUS the bloodshed?”
“Hmm,” his arms folded. “I don’t know. We really like blood sacrificing things.”
“Trust me. This will be SO much better. And, hey, if we fail to entertain, you can slaughter us anyway!”
I felt the cringe behind me.
His head tilted. “Ya know, that’s a pretty impossible deal to pass up. Alright, we’ll take you guys to the Coliseum of Frank. You’ll put on your show. If Frank is happy then you guys can, I don’t know, live or whatever. But, if Frank isn’t satisfied...there will be blood.”
I mean, I had to accept. It was take the deal or die instantly. So, I shook hands with the purge masked man and bought us some additional time.