Post by Vargas on Apr 7, 2014 20:49:17 GMT -5
(The scene opens to the high school gymnasium in downtown Bozeman, Montana where Massacre just took place. Chad Vargas is seen backstage, bandage over his forehead, fresh from the Internet championship #1 contendership battle royal. He appears to be on his phone.)
Vargas: (talking into his phone, clearly irritated) I had to have dropped 20 fuckin’ Snakeskin DDTs onto those cunts – and being eliminated by that fuckin’ no good no talent hack ass hat Per – (refusing to capitalize the fucking z) zig!? Un fucking believable. Just wasn’t my night, Treat – No. No I didn’t fuckin’ drink before the match you cock! Anyways I’ll see you back in Tennessee I’m gettin the fuck out of this shithole as fast as I can! Alright, okay, hoss – Thanks.
(Vargas ends the call and shoves the phone into his jeans pocket. He looks over, noticing OCW cameras on him.)
Vargas: Hey fuckbag – you want somethin’ for nothin’?! Well here it is – Online Championship Wrestling – a place I’m callin’ home for now on, just because of a guy of my caliber falling in a fluke match doesn’t mean shit – so keep my fuckin’ name off of your “is he legit” columns and all the other bullshit you ---gots like to spread around the internet. I’m the man and everyone around here knows it. I may be an asshole but I give credit where credit is due, Kobra – you fought a damn good match and congratulations to you. You’re name is still fuckin’ fruity as all hell and you still are a shitstain on the OCW. Get out of my face!
(The OCW cameraman can be heard.)
OCW cameraman: Nobody is in your face, sir.
Vargas: Oh so get me with a technicality. Keep your lips zipped and do your fuckin’ job! Roll the goddamn camera and keep your petty opinions to yourself before I take the fuckin’ life out of you!
Now – anyway – so, again Kobra – congrats. You’ll go onto face Scott Syren the 21st and get your ass handed to you and winning this shit battle royal will be your one claim to fame, you're entire career, besides those hideous tattoos of yours. Welcome to your 15 minutes of fame, hoss - you're somebody now!
(Vargas claps his hands sarcastically.)
Kenny Davis III – or better known as “KC3” I enjoyed your shit heap you called a promo last week and I gotta say, kid – you’ve got a lot of learning to do. I think I’d rather watch monkeys fuck than watch that garbage you produce. I think it’s funny that you shit talk me about googling me and finding some website of “mine” on the internet. I saw what you we’re talking about, big deal? So some low rent loser kid made a page honoring a legend of the sport. So you Googled me? So what. I’m everywhere. Thanks for taking the time to look into me. (rolls eyes) You know what I found when I googled you? Nothing. Nothing about wrestling anyway. I found a bunch of gay porn that you’ve starred in before an article of alleging KC1, KC2, KC3, a bottle of rum, two cousins and a batch of inbreeding. I’m almost certain it was you. Sure looked like your skinny nerdy ass. I could be mistaken I guess. Anyway pal, hows about this? Hows about Pres. Dean sets you and I up in a match at Total Demolition one – on – one. For nothing other than me kickin’ the ever loving shit out of you just for lack of respect that you’ve shown me. I will put you’re fuckin’ nose down your throat and piss on your rotting carcass in the middle of that ring two Sundays from now, that is if your scrawny bitch ass is man enough to accept!? Prez Dean if this guy will accept this - how's about you doin' a guy a solid and booking me against this female organ?!
(Vargas smirks arrogantly flexing his muscles, flips off the camera as he randomly walks off camera view, clearly intoxicated.)
Vargas: (talking into his phone, clearly irritated) I had to have dropped 20 fuckin’ Snakeskin DDTs onto those cunts – and being eliminated by that fuckin’ no good no talent hack ass hat Per – (refusing to capitalize the fucking z) zig!? Un fucking believable. Just wasn’t my night, Treat – No. No I didn’t fuckin’ drink before the match you cock! Anyways I’ll see you back in Tennessee I’m gettin the fuck out of this shithole as fast as I can! Alright, okay, hoss – Thanks.
(Vargas ends the call and shoves the phone into his jeans pocket. He looks over, noticing OCW cameras on him.)
Vargas: Hey fuckbag – you want somethin’ for nothin’?! Well here it is – Online Championship Wrestling – a place I’m callin’ home for now on, just because of a guy of my caliber falling in a fluke match doesn’t mean shit – so keep my fuckin’ name off of your “is he legit” columns and all the other bullshit you ---gots like to spread around the internet. I’m the man and everyone around here knows it. I may be an asshole but I give credit where credit is due, Kobra – you fought a damn good match and congratulations to you. You’re name is still fuckin’ fruity as all hell and you still are a shitstain on the OCW. Get out of my face!
(The OCW cameraman can be heard.)
OCW cameraman: Nobody is in your face, sir.
Vargas: Oh so get me with a technicality. Keep your lips zipped and do your fuckin’ job! Roll the goddamn camera and keep your petty opinions to yourself before I take the fuckin’ life out of you!
Now – anyway – so, again Kobra – congrats. You’ll go onto face Scott Syren the 21st and get your ass handed to you and winning this shit battle royal will be your one claim to fame, you're entire career, besides those hideous tattoos of yours. Welcome to your 15 minutes of fame, hoss - you're somebody now!
(Vargas claps his hands sarcastically.)
Kenny Davis III – or better known as “KC3” I enjoyed your shit heap you called a promo last week and I gotta say, kid – you’ve got a lot of learning to do. I think I’d rather watch monkeys fuck than watch that garbage you produce. I think it’s funny that you shit talk me about googling me and finding some website of “mine” on the internet. I saw what you we’re talking about, big deal? So some low rent loser kid made a page honoring a legend of the sport. So you Googled me? So what. I’m everywhere. Thanks for taking the time to look into me. (rolls eyes) You know what I found when I googled you? Nothing. Nothing about wrestling anyway. I found a bunch of gay porn that you’ve starred in before an article of alleging KC1, KC2, KC3, a bottle of rum, two cousins and a batch of inbreeding. I’m almost certain it was you. Sure looked like your skinny nerdy ass. I could be mistaken I guess. Anyway pal, hows about this? Hows about Pres. Dean sets you and I up in a match at Total Demolition one – on – one. For nothing other than me kickin’ the ever loving shit out of you just for lack of respect that you’ve shown me. I will put you’re fuckin’ nose down your throat and piss on your rotting carcass in the middle of that ring two Sundays from now, that is if your scrawny bitch ass is man enough to accept!? Prez Dean if this guy will accept this - how's about you doin' a guy a solid and booking me against this female organ?!
(Vargas smirks arrogantly flexing his muscles, flips off the camera as he randomly walks off camera view, clearly intoxicated.)
