Post by Team A.T.A.R.I. on Aug 8, 2019 12:54:53 GMT -5
Scene opens up inside of an office setting with a couple hundred cubicles all looking the same. All this grey fabric cubicles around the five and a half foot height, just high enough to block anyone on the inside from looking out and talking to someone else during work hours.
They are also just tall enough to block anyone from looking in. Almost.
Enter a mid aged slightly overweight gent in a plain white shirt and khakis with well worn out penny loafers. His thick dark rim glasses has the glare of his monitor reflecting off of his lenses as he busy with his data entry job, a job where he wishes he could have 2 screens instead of splitting his 15 inch screen in two to save him from flipping back and forth between screens. His name is Tim as we can see his name badge and Tim is hiding a secret.
Tim is one of those conspiracy junkies and Tim believes that it is the government who made a deal with our capturers to keep us under the dome and it’s the Yamauchi who is trying to free us. As you can imagine, Tim spends several hours after work searching the internet to see what Team ATARI is doing to keep us enslaved to this alien race. Sometimes this research also spills into his work.
Tim’s phone buzzes and he has his phone set to alert him of one thing and one thing only.
Yamauchi news updates.
Tim quickly picks up his phone that is plugged into his charger on the desk by his keyboard. A high level classified document is being shared on the dark web with the hashtag #DigDugFound.
Dig Dug for the ones of you who don’t know, don’t remember or just don’t give a fuck and could care less, is the headquarters for Team ATARI. It is based in the US, being a high security level government agency that is not officially recognized by the US government. It’s location has always been a mystery.
Until now.
Tim’s eyes light up. “Holy shit!” he whispers to himself. “Fuck! We’ve got them!” He then utters to himself. He wants to watch this video, badly. So badly that he is sporting wood. (Not much of a love life I’m guessing). But Tim can’t get busted watching another one of “those” videos again, with Nancy making a scene the last time, making it sound like he’s watching porn or something.
Nancy sits across from Tim and just can’t mind her own fucking buisness. Always spying, asking questions. So much so Tim is convinced Nancy is a Team ATARI spy. Tim glances over his shoulder and Nancy is away.
“Thank god….fucking cunt.” Tim says under his breath. Tim flips his phone over and unlocks it, his finger hovering over the link on the alert. But first, he has to stretch.
Time stands up and throws his arms up in the air, gives out a fake yawn and gives a quick look, as he does every 33 minutes, every day, all day long at work. It’s a routine. It also allows him to see the lay of the land quick, see where everyone is, if anyone is out of place and more importantly, see where fucking Nancy is. And she’s doing her second task at work. Brown nosing with Brad. The boss. Brad is a tall slender semi athletic chap in good shape, likes to run mudders and is single. All the ladies swoon over him but he can’t fool Tim. Tim knows Brad is gay and he figures that Nancy knows this as well, but is tring her best to turn him. Because every gay guy wants to bang a short haired red head, not natural at that, 300 pound fucking cunt. But there Nancy is, touching Brad’s arm and laughing at all his jokes, and listens to his latest mudder stories from the weekend.
Tim sits down because he knows he’s got like 8 minutes till Nancy waddles back to her desk to spy on him some more. His finger pressed on the link, which opens up a dark web forum, and on this forum is a video. Tim hits play……
It’s a hidden cell phone shot video of an internal Yamauchi video. Who shot the video and leaked it is a question for another day. There are several anti Yamauchi groups out there who leak shit everyday. These groups are where Tim gets most of his Yamauchi news as they are tight lipped in general. The video is of Julian Assange, leader of the Yamauchi who has gone into hiding a couple of months ago. The media will have you believe he was arrested, but that is truly fake news, a staged event for the masses. He went into hiding. Something is up and Tim is not sure why either. The clip is short and to the point. Julian is looking to his left at some sort of meeting.
“Are you sure the Dig Dug, Team ATARI’s headquarters is in Area 51?” Julian says and nods. “And the crystals, they are there? Good. Great! No, this is great news! Now we can get those crystals and get one step closer to completing the Energon Device. This is fantastic. Now we just need a plan to attack Area 51…..”
Julian looks to his right.
“Hashtag storm area 51?” Julian says and thinks about it for a second. He slaps his hand on the table top. “I LOVE IT! Yes! Let’s free the aliens!” He says and everyone laughs and the video ends.
“Holy fuck!” Tim whispers so excited. “This is it! The end of Team ATARI! Fuck! Shit!”
“Excuse me?” Nancy says very loudly as she returned to her cubicle. Tim spins around and Nancy is standing at the opening to his cubicle. “Are you watching more porn on your phone?” Nancy then says making sure everyone hears this, including Brad, who starts to make his way over towards them.
Tim stands up, ripping his charger out of the outlet strip.
“You know what Nancy. Why don’t you suck my dick!” Tim says equally as loud. Nancy’s jaw drops and her multi chins jiggle as well.
“I’m so sick of your shit bitch! I wasn’t watching porn! I was chatting with my mom, my dying mother with cancer! She could die any day now and I’m stuck here, getting harassed by your fat ass! Sorry if my dying mother wants to facetime her only son!”
Tim of course is lying, but no one knows this and Nancy is so embarrassed. Brad stops about halfway to the scene once he heard Tim tell Nancy off.
“Oh I’m so sorry!”
“Fuck you Nancy! All you do is sit over there and watch what I’m doing all day! I don’t know what I did to you but this shit needs to stop! Do I say anything to you about how you go to fucking Brad’s office 9 times a day? No I do not! Why are you wasting your time anyways? Brad ain’t fucking you! Johnny has a better chance to fuck Brad!” Tim blasts Nancy with as he starts to leave. Johnny, BTW, is openly gay, and might have a crush on Brad too.
“Oh Tim! I’m so sorry! Please don’t go!”
“I’m outta here you goddamn cunt!” Tim shouts at Nancy across the office as he hits the door and leaves. As Tim exits, and the door closes behind him, he can’t help but smile.
That! That felt good.
Changing scenes to the Oval office.
Yes, thee Oval Office.
2600 and 7800 along with Nolan are sitting on the couches inside the oval office patiently waiting for Willy Mackey (aka The President) to enter the Oval office. How long they have been there, how they got there is unclear. Nolan looks like he’s been there a couple hundred times and is bored with it. 2600 is uptight, his first visit to the oval office and is sweating bullets. 7800 on the other hand is looking at the nicknacks and whatever on the end tables, flipping them over and see where the stuff was made.
“Dilly?”
2600’s eyes get wide. “Put that down 7800! That could be an antique from the early 1800’s!”
Nolan looks at 7800 with a puzzled look on his face. “What do you mean it has a sticker on it?”
“Dilly dilly!” 7800 says and tosses it to Nolan, 2600 is about to stroke out as Nolan catches it and flips it over.
“Kmart? Didn’t that company just went out of business?”
“Dilly dilly.”
“I thought so too. Huh! President is a tightwad I guess.”
Just then the doors to the Oval office open as 2 secret service agents flank the door and the President of the US, Trump walks into the office. Nolan and 2600 stand up and salutes President Trump while 7800 just sits there. Must be a democrat.
“Mister President sir!” 2600 says tight as a banjo string.
Trump stands in front of his desk looking at the trio.
“Mister President. Nice to see you again.” Nolan says.
“Yes Nolan. It is fantastic to see you again.” Trump says.
“Dilly dilly. Dilly dilly.” 7800 says as he then slowly stands up and extends his hand towards Trump. 2600’s eyes are bulging out of his eye sockets and if he could choke 7800 out and get away with it right then and there, he would. Even Nolan holds his breath to see how Trump took 7800’s joke. Finally Trump grins and laughs. He shakes 7800 hands.
“The sense of humor on this guy, it’s fantastic.”
7800 falls back into line, and sports a smirk and looks at 2600 who is standing across from him, right there, on the edge of a heart attack.
“That was great. You know what else is great? What is fantastic? How you two captured two more pieces of the Energon Devise. Yes, that was brilliant. That was just outstanding. You two should be very proud of yourselves.”
“Thank you Mister President.” Nolan says.
“No! Thank you! You helped keep America Safe. I should put that on a hat!”
“Dilly dilly.”
Trump again laughs. This time he slaps 7800 on the shoulder.
“This guy! I swear! I might have to fire someone just to put you on my staff. I can use someone like you on my staff.”
7800 gives 2600 a “There! Fuck you.” look.
“Look. the real reason why I called you here at short notice is this whole storm Area 51 movement that has been happening on social media. Why I don’t think anyone is actually going to storm Area 51, because that would be silly, just very very silly, ludacris even. Nevertheless, we have to take this threat seriously. Therefore, I need my two best men on this silly movement. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you what Area 51 means as it is a great place, a wonderful place. But the secrets at Area 51 have to remain just that, a secret! Therefore, I need you two to snuff out this movement and make sure that no one invades Area 51. Okay?”
“Not a problem Mister President.” Nolan says.
“Great! Super! Fantastic!”
“It’ll be my honor Mister President!” 2600 says.
“Great! Great! Thanks!”
“Dilly dilly!”
Trump then laughs. This time he gives 7800 a hug. After a little more small talk for a minute or two, they all shake hands and Team ATARI exits the Oval Office, on the way to Area 51, to defeat the blasted scum of the earth, the Yamauchi!
They are also just tall enough to block anyone from looking in. Almost.
Enter a mid aged slightly overweight gent in a plain white shirt and khakis with well worn out penny loafers. His thick dark rim glasses has the glare of his monitor reflecting off of his lenses as he busy with his data entry job, a job where he wishes he could have 2 screens instead of splitting his 15 inch screen in two to save him from flipping back and forth between screens. His name is Tim as we can see his name badge and Tim is hiding a secret.
Tim is one of those conspiracy junkies and Tim believes that it is the government who made a deal with our capturers to keep us under the dome and it’s the Yamauchi who is trying to free us. As you can imagine, Tim spends several hours after work searching the internet to see what Team ATARI is doing to keep us enslaved to this alien race. Sometimes this research also spills into his work.
Tim’s phone buzzes and he has his phone set to alert him of one thing and one thing only.
Yamauchi news updates.
Tim quickly picks up his phone that is plugged into his charger on the desk by his keyboard. A high level classified document is being shared on the dark web with the hashtag #DigDugFound.
Dig Dug for the ones of you who don’t know, don’t remember or just don’t give a fuck and could care less, is the headquarters for Team ATARI. It is based in the US, being a high security level government agency that is not officially recognized by the US government. It’s location has always been a mystery.
Until now.
Tim’s eyes light up. “Holy shit!” he whispers to himself. “Fuck! We’ve got them!” He then utters to himself. He wants to watch this video, badly. So badly that he is sporting wood. (Not much of a love life I’m guessing). But Tim can’t get busted watching another one of “those” videos again, with Nancy making a scene the last time, making it sound like he’s watching porn or something.
Nancy sits across from Tim and just can’t mind her own fucking buisness. Always spying, asking questions. So much so Tim is convinced Nancy is a Team ATARI spy. Tim glances over his shoulder and Nancy is away.
“Thank god….fucking cunt.” Tim says under his breath. Tim flips his phone over and unlocks it, his finger hovering over the link on the alert. But first, he has to stretch.
Time stands up and throws his arms up in the air, gives out a fake yawn and gives a quick look, as he does every 33 minutes, every day, all day long at work. It’s a routine. It also allows him to see the lay of the land quick, see where everyone is, if anyone is out of place and more importantly, see where fucking Nancy is. And she’s doing her second task at work. Brown nosing with Brad. The boss. Brad is a tall slender semi athletic chap in good shape, likes to run mudders and is single. All the ladies swoon over him but he can’t fool Tim. Tim knows Brad is gay and he figures that Nancy knows this as well, but is tring her best to turn him. Because every gay guy wants to bang a short haired red head, not natural at that, 300 pound fucking cunt. But there Nancy is, touching Brad’s arm and laughing at all his jokes, and listens to his latest mudder stories from the weekend.
Tim sits down because he knows he’s got like 8 minutes till Nancy waddles back to her desk to spy on him some more. His finger pressed on the link, which opens up a dark web forum, and on this forum is a video. Tim hits play……
It’s a hidden cell phone shot video of an internal Yamauchi video. Who shot the video and leaked it is a question for another day. There are several anti Yamauchi groups out there who leak shit everyday. These groups are where Tim gets most of his Yamauchi news as they are tight lipped in general. The video is of Julian Assange, leader of the Yamauchi who has gone into hiding a couple of months ago. The media will have you believe he was arrested, but that is truly fake news, a staged event for the masses. He went into hiding. Something is up and Tim is not sure why either. The clip is short and to the point. Julian is looking to his left at some sort of meeting.
“Are you sure the Dig Dug, Team ATARI’s headquarters is in Area 51?” Julian says and nods. “And the crystals, they are there? Good. Great! No, this is great news! Now we can get those crystals and get one step closer to completing the Energon Device. This is fantastic. Now we just need a plan to attack Area 51…..”
Julian looks to his right.
“Hashtag storm area 51?” Julian says and thinks about it for a second. He slaps his hand on the table top. “I LOVE IT! Yes! Let’s free the aliens!” He says and everyone laughs and the video ends.
“Holy fuck!” Tim whispers so excited. “This is it! The end of Team ATARI! Fuck! Shit!”
“Excuse me?” Nancy says very loudly as she returned to her cubicle. Tim spins around and Nancy is standing at the opening to his cubicle. “Are you watching more porn on your phone?” Nancy then says making sure everyone hears this, including Brad, who starts to make his way over towards them.
Tim stands up, ripping his charger out of the outlet strip.
“You know what Nancy. Why don’t you suck my dick!” Tim says equally as loud. Nancy’s jaw drops and her multi chins jiggle as well.
“I’m so sick of your shit bitch! I wasn’t watching porn! I was chatting with my mom, my dying mother with cancer! She could die any day now and I’m stuck here, getting harassed by your fat ass! Sorry if my dying mother wants to facetime her only son!”
Tim of course is lying, but no one knows this and Nancy is so embarrassed. Brad stops about halfway to the scene once he heard Tim tell Nancy off.
“Oh I’m so sorry!”
“Fuck you Nancy! All you do is sit over there and watch what I’m doing all day! I don’t know what I did to you but this shit needs to stop! Do I say anything to you about how you go to fucking Brad’s office 9 times a day? No I do not! Why are you wasting your time anyways? Brad ain’t fucking you! Johnny has a better chance to fuck Brad!” Tim blasts Nancy with as he starts to leave. Johnny, BTW, is openly gay, and might have a crush on Brad too.
“Oh Tim! I’m so sorry! Please don’t go!”
“I’m outta here you goddamn cunt!” Tim shouts at Nancy across the office as he hits the door and leaves. As Tim exits, and the door closes behind him, he can’t help but smile.
That! That felt good.
Changing scenes to the Oval office.
Yes, thee Oval Office.
2600 and 7800 along with Nolan are sitting on the couches inside the oval office patiently waiting for Willy Mackey (aka The President) to enter the Oval office. How long they have been there, how they got there is unclear. Nolan looks like he’s been there a couple hundred times and is bored with it. 2600 is uptight, his first visit to the oval office and is sweating bullets. 7800 on the other hand is looking at the nicknacks and whatever on the end tables, flipping them over and see where the stuff was made.
“Dilly?”
2600’s eyes get wide. “Put that down 7800! That could be an antique from the early 1800’s!”
Nolan looks at 7800 with a puzzled look on his face. “What do you mean it has a sticker on it?”
“Dilly dilly!” 7800 says and tosses it to Nolan, 2600 is about to stroke out as Nolan catches it and flips it over.
“Kmart? Didn’t that company just went out of business?”
“Dilly dilly.”
“I thought so too. Huh! President is a tightwad I guess.”
Just then the doors to the Oval office open as 2 secret service agents flank the door and the President of the US, Trump walks into the office. Nolan and 2600 stand up and salutes President Trump while 7800 just sits there. Must be a democrat.
“Mister President sir!” 2600 says tight as a banjo string.
Trump stands in front of his desk looking at the trio.
“Mister President. Nice to see you again.” Nolan says.
“Yes Nolan. It is fantastic to see you again.” Trump says.
“Dilly dilly. Dilly dilly.” 7800 says as he then slowly stands up and extends his hand towards Trump. 2600’s eyes are bulging out of his eye sockets and if he could choke 7800 out and get away with it right then and there, he would. Even Nolan holds his breath to see how Trump took 7800’s joke. Finally Trump grins and laughs. He shakes 7800 hands.
“The sense of humor on this guy, it’s fantastic.”
7800 falls back into line, and sports a smirk and looks at 2600 who is standing across from him, right there, on the edge of a heart attack.
“That was great. You know what else is great? What is fantastic? How you two captured two more pieces of the Energon Devise. Yes, that was brilliant. That was just outstanding. You two should be very proud of yourselves.”
“Thank you Mister President.” Nolan says.
“No! Thank you! You helped keep America Safe. I should put that on a hat!”
“Dilly dilly.”
Trump again laughs. This time he slaps 7800 on the shoulder.
“This guy! I swear! I might have to fire someone just to put you on my staff. I can use someone like you on my staff.”
7800 gives 2600 a “There! Fuck you.” look.
“Look. the real reason why I called you here at short notice is this whole storm Area 51 movement that has been happening on social media. Why I don’t think anyone is actually going to storm Area 51, because that would be silly, just very very silly, ludacris even. Nevertheless, we have to take this threat seriously. Therefore, I need my two best men on this silly movement. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you what Area 51 means as it is a great place, a wonderful place. But the secrets at Area 51 have to remain just that, a secret! Therefore, I need you two to snuff out this movement and make sure that no one invades Area 51. Okay?”
“Not a problem Mister President.” Nolan says.
“Great! Super! Fantastic!”
“It’ll be my honor Mister President!” 2600 says.
“Great! Great! Thanks!”
“Dilly dilly!”
Trump then laughs. This time he gives 7800 a hug. After a little more small talk for a minute or two, they all shake hands and Team ATARI exits the Oval Office, on the way to Area 51, to defeat the blasted scum of the earth, the Yamauchi!
