They Meet

[Mario Maurako]

ACT I: They Meet
Give Kids The World: Kissimmee, Florida
3/19/2014 08:00

We join Mario Maurako at Give Kids The World Village in Kissimmee Florida. He has already sat through the painstaking Volunteer Training sessions. Who knew that volunteering was so particular? We meet up with Mario inside a building that looks like a giant ice cream sundae. Inside it looks like a traditional ice cream parlor. Behind the counter stands Mario Maurako himself, sporting a red button down shirt, with the sleeves rolled half way up, and sporting a white apron. A line of kids and parents form out the door as the families all want to take part in the Village’s famous “Ice Cream for Breakfast”. Mario is clearly annoyed as he stands there tapping his foot on the ground as a kid struggles with the ever so important decision of which ice cream to get.

Mario Maurako: Just pick one! Hell, pick both or all of them! I don’t care!

Mario starts scooping a little of four different ice creams into a little container. He then nods at the kid and the kid grabs the ice cream and runs off. That’s right, at Give Kids the World the Ice Cream is free. After all this place was built to make kids dreams come true. Just as one man’s trash is another man’s treasure, any kids dream is typically Mario’s nightmare. The next kid steps up to the counter.

Mario Maurako: What would you like?

Boy #1: I’d like a Vanilla shake.

If Mario’s face could show any more frustration it does after the boy requests a shake.

Mario Maurako: A Vanilla Shake?

Boy #1: Yes please.

Mario turns his back to the kid and faces the Shake machine. Mario whispers under his breath ‘son of a bitch’, and he stares at the Shake machine fairly clueless as to how to make a shake.

Mario Maurako: Stupid fuckin’ Vanilla shake.

Mario takes a couple scoops of Vanilla ice cream and places them in a cup, and pours in a little milk. He then looks around and raises the cup up into a metal piece that is used to whip the ice cream up. Mario looks around confused when the machine doesn’t start up by itself. Kind of like when you’re used to using bathrooms with automatic sink and then you go to one that you have to manually turn the sink on. Mario then finally realizes that he has to flip the red button to turn the machine on. Unfortunately for Mario he stopped paying attention while looking for the button and now he no longer has the metal piece buried in the ice cream like he is supposed to. This causes ice cream and milk to come flying out of the cup and all over Mario and the counter. The little boy on the other side of the counter begins to laugh at Mario’s misfortune. Mario turns around and his face is red with anger.

Nicoletta De Carlo: You look like you could use a hand.

Before Mario could respond he looks over in the direction of the voice and much to his surprise there stands Nicoletta De Carlo, the Italian Soccer League star that he has been drooling over for the last week or so. At this point Mario’s mind must be jello as he just stands there like a goof. Nicoletta slowly pries the cup from Mario’s hand and drops it in the garbage. She then grabs a fresh cup and begins to make the shake for the boy.

Nicoletta De Carlo: Are you just going to stand there big guy or are you going to help the next in line?

Mario snaps out of his trance and rushes back to the counter.

Mario Maurako: Umm, can I help you?

Girl #1: I’ll take strawberry on a sugar cone please.

Mario grabs a sugar cone and watches Nicoletta in her white, low cut, tank top fix the Vanilla Shake. Mario then returns to the counter and scoops out the strawberry ice cream and hands it to the little girl.

2 Hours Later

Mario and Nicoletta have finished up their shift at the Ice Cream shop and both take a little ice cream container to go. They make their way outside the shop and take a seat in what looks like a big sundae bowl.

Mario Maurako: I’ve got to admit a little secret. I’m a pretty big fan of yours.

Nicoletta De Carlo: Oh yeah? You want the Italian leagues do you?

Mario Maurako: Only the best futbol played on earth. You’re amazing. But what happened out there the other day? Are you okay?

Nicoletta De Carlo: I’m okay in terms of that I don’t have to worry about any long term health issues. But they say I can never play futbol again. But as long as we are telling secrets I have a little secret to tell you.

Mario Maurako: Oh yeah, what’s that?

Nicoletta De Carlo: I’m actually a big fan of yours as well.

Mario’s face grows a shade of red. He’s always fallen hard for the ladies.

Nicoletta De Carlo: You’ve got a huge opportunity ahead you this week. Anytime you have a chance to win a Championship it is just another chance to add an accolade and prove you are the greatest of all time.

Mario Maurako: Yeah, but at the same time I’ve been in these matches dozens if not hundreds of times. I’ve got a huge edge experience wise over the young punk kid Pryde. He’s not going to show my anything that I haven’t already seen time and time again. Sure I don’t know who he really is under that mask. But that doesn’t matter to me. I don’t care that he looks like an un-bathed mule and he’s ashamed to show that face that only his mother could love. Or maybe she couldn’t love it, that certainly would explain a lot.

Nicoletta De Carlo: He seems to be quite the athletic specimen.

Mario drops his spoon back into his ice cream out of shock and amazement.

Mario Maurako: Are you serious? I can do anything that he can do, but better.

Nicoletta De Carlo: Really? You can do that dragonrana in the corner?

Mario Maurako: I could if I felt the move wasn’t so incredibly dirty.

Mario couldn’t do that move if his life depended on it, and both he and Nicoletta know that.

Nicoletta De Carlo: Oh you’re just trying to impress me. It’s okay handsome, you’re a much ’bigger’ draw.

Nicoletta runs her hand down the jaw line of Mario, a blatant act of seduction. One of which makes Mario melt like butter.

Mario Maurako: Would you be interested in coming to Blackout? I can get you in hang out with me and The Family in the back. It would be fun.

Nicoletta De Carlo: I would actually love to go and see things behind the scenes. I’ve been a wrestling fan my whole life and never got to see the stuff on the other side of the curtain.

Mario Maurako: Yeah, it’s pretty much my life and my legacy. That’s why OCW is so important to me. That is where I made my start and got big. I can’t stand to see it as anything but the best promotion in the country. That’s why it must die. And that’s where it gets pretty awkward for Pryde. Because he’s standing directly in my way of putting my foot on the throat of OCW and choking it the fuck out.

Mario covers his mouth and looks around to see if any children heard him. Frankly, he didn’t give a fuck, but he wanted to put on a good show for Nicoletta.

Mario Maurako: You know what? Why don’t you come with me to the Magic Kingdom tomorrow… it’s my 40th birthday tomorrow. You wouldn’t deny the birthday boy his wish now would you?

Nicoletta smiles sweetly, but deep inside the heart of this cold blooded killer is only happy that things are going smoothly. Her sights are solely set on hitting the mark and getting back to her life as soon as possible.

Nicoletta De Carlo: I will. But first you must do one last thing for me. The Village here asked me to do the tuck in’s tonight as Miss Mary.

Mario Maurako: Who is Miss Mary?

Nicoletta De Carlo: The Mayor’s wife… the girl rabbit.

Mario Maurako: Oh okay cool. Good for you.

Nicoletta De Carlo: Well the guy who was going to play the Mayor backed out. Could you fill in?

Mario hides the pain inside with a smile on his face.

Mario Maurako: Sure, I would love to.

12 Hours Later; 2100 Hours

The scene re-opens on a bright multi-colored little cottage. It is painted with bright yellows, and blues, and purples, everything a child would adore in a color scheme, and a sane adult would hate. Inside an anxious family awaits their Tuck-in time with Mayor Clayton, as portrayed by Mario Maurako. The family is a family of 4, two kids, a boy and a girl, and their parents. The little girl, has been sick and you can tell life has been wearing her down. But here at Give Kids the World, none of that has mattered. Her face is bright with life and full of smiles. That’s when the knock on the door comes and the kids run off to their bedroom.

The Dad opens the door and in walks Mario Maurako sporting a goofy looking Rabbit costume, to make it even goofier the Rabbit appears to be wearing pajamas. As part of strict rules by Give Kids The World Mario has been instructed that he cannot talk to the families and he has been given a helper who will do all the talking.

The two walk into the house and Mario clumsily makes his way toward the kids bedroom. After all it’s hard to see out of the large rabbit head. Mario walks in and hits his rabbit ears on the ceiling fan as it spins around. The force of the blow almost knock off the rabbit head, and how traumatic would that have been for this Make-A-Wish Family to have observed. But thankfully tragedy was averted and Mario simply backed up and then reached up and pulled the chord to turn the fan off.

The kids curl up in their bed unsure of what is about to go down. Mario sits down the girls bed and starts to bounce up and down and the girls starts to giggle. Mario then stands up and begins to tickle her feet as her laughs get even louder. Then Mario yanks the covers off of her bed. He lifts the blanket high into the air and as it floats down the gets all bundled up and ends up not covering up the child’s knees or lower. Mario turns towards the boy and then notices he didn’t exactly cover the girl up. So he turns back around and pulls the blanket down over her feet and then tucks the blanket under her feet. He then turns her to one side and tucks the blanked under her and then rolls her on the other side and tucks the blanket under her again. Now she looks like a human sized blunt.

Mario pretends to wipe sweat away from his bunny forehead and turns to the boy who is laughing at his sister who is now tucked in so tightly she can barely move. Mario grabs the boy’s pillow and begins to fluff it in his hands. Then he takes the pillow and smacks it on the side of the bed and the boy laughs hysterically. It is then that Mario notices the boys two huge buck teeth. The teeth remind Mario of the un-bathed mule comment he made earlier in the day to Nicoletta. Mario’s mind starts to run wild and suddenly it’s not the boy he sees in the bed anymore, it’s Pryde. Mario stands there for a second shocked and the boy keeps laughing. Yet in Mario’s head it is Pryde that is laying there laughing at him. Suddenly Mario lifts the pillow high up over his head and slams it down on the pillow. Mario starts going nuts slamming the kid in the face repeatedly with the pillow as the kids parents come storming into the room.

Dad: What’s going on!?

The Dad’s voice seems to bring Mario back to a sense of reality and he sees the kid laying in the bed, tears rolling down his face. Mario stands there frozen. Then after what seems like an eternity Mario drops the pillow and starts running for the door, which is really hard to do in giant bunny feet. He looks more like a Scuba Diver trying to run. After Mario and the helper have escaped the house Mario rips the rabbit head off of his body.

Volunteer: What happened in there?

Mario Maurako: I don’t know, that boy. He was just so ugly. Did you see his teeth? He reminded me of someone… and I just lost it. I’m sorry. I’ve got to go.

The scene fades to black.