Post by Bob Grenier on Jan 23, 2015 16:12:20 GMT -5
We fade into the SportsPlex in Timmins, Ontario, Canada to a rambunctious
crowd of about 300. It's a very small town. A woman holds up a sign that
says "Bob, You are the Father!" and right beside her is another girl
also holding up a sign which reads "Of mine too!". We cut to Hood and
Smith at ringside.
Smith: Welcome to Grenier's Rules, Live from.. Canada?!
Hood: Yes, Northern Canada at that. I had a frightening experience with a
Grizzly Bear earlier today. Also almost hit a Moose on the 101 with my
rental car. I hate Canada.
Smith: Hope you had Moose Insurance.
Hood: Good grief. Someone Get me out of here.
"X Gonna Give it to Ya" by DMX begins to blare throughout
the arena as Bob Grenier emerges in all his glory. He makes his way to
the ring, On the way down the aisle he kisses the babies of all the
unwed mothers in town, for all you know a few of them could be his.
Grenier slides into the ring and soaks up the adulation of the small
crowd. He asks for a microphone and is immediately brought one by Smith.
Bob: Ladies and Gentleman, Welcome to THE FIRST OCW WEB SHOW. We have a lot of
action here tonight, but before we begin the festivities, I'd like to
ask my Native brothers in attendance to enter the ring and perform a
traditional native dance for us.
Hood: Really? This is absurd.
Smith: Timmins is home to many native reserves.
Hood: Well the more you know, Who told you that?
Smith: Bob did!
Hood: Of course.
Bob looks out into the crowd and motions for the natives in the crowd to
come into the ring and bless it. They do not move a muscle. It turns out
they are drunk, and perhaps huffing gasoline.
Bob: Or not.. You folks just have a good time ok. Enjoy the show. Tell Chief RunningWater I say, Aniish na?
Smith: He speaks Ojibwe! Wow! What a guy!
Hood: I'm tired of this already.
Bob: On February 28th 2015, I will walk out of Revenge the OCW World
Heavyweight Champion. It's about time that I got what I truly deserve, I
stayed with this company until it burned to the ground, I never
abandoned the sinking ship and I was the first fucking one in line when
Dean re-opened the doors so you know what, I'd like to thank you Dean, for the opportunity you've given me. I
went ahead and did you a favor buddy!
Hood: What could Bob possibly have done for the President of this company?
Smith: I bet it will be magical. Bob Grenier always delivers.
Bob: I went out and I recruited to OCW , the greatest tag team
anyone in the history of this business has ever laid eyes upon. Coming
down the aisle, from Hollywood, California.. I think.. At a combined weight of.. Well
I forget.. Fuck it. It's the Hollywood Brothers, Ryan Hollywood and
Hollywood Skyes!!
The two former OCW rejects slowly walk down the
aisle, to no reaction what-so-ever. They are incredibly bland and
untalented. They climb into the ring and stand face to face with Bob
Grenier, looking for a way to prove themselves and re-enter the ranks of
OCW.
Bob: Sorry Dean, really the best I can do for you.
The Hollywood Brothers, not looking very menacing, inch closer to Grenier. They are looking for a fight.
Bob: Easy Sparky, Rover, You ain't having a match with me tonight. I'm in
the main event later on. I do however a glorious opportunity for you
gentleman. If you overcome my challenge here this evening on Bob Grenier
Rules, I will walk away. I will quit and the two of you can take my one
spot on the roster!
The Hollywood Brothers both nod in unison
and are about as amped as two losers who will never make it can be. Bob
smiles at them and exits the ring.
Bob makes his way over to the announce table and put's on a headset.
Bob: Ladies and gentleman, Their opponent..
Smith: Who could it be?
Hood: Well this just got interesting.
Bob: Of course it did. I always deliver, Carry this whole company on my Damn back.
The lights go down as The Hollywood Brothers pace around the ring, awaiting
their opposition. The opening guitar rift roars through the arena as
the fans get to their feet knowing what that sound means. The lights on
the stage set pan slowly towards the entrance way where Rachel Valdez
comes walking onto the set with a microphone in her hand. She'll pose
for a second or two before speaking into her microphone.
Rachel Valdez: "This is Awe.Some!"
At that point with the song kicking into gear, Ricky and Randy Valdez both
run through the curtain and straight to the ring, slapping the hands of
fans along the way. Rachel Valdez follows closely behind. The three of
them all slide under the bottom rope. Ricky and Randy proceed to climb
the turnbuckles on opposite sides of the ring. The brothers point to
various sections of the crowd to get them excited while Rachel Valdez
leans over the top rope to blow a kiss to the fans at ringside.
Bob: It's AWE.SOME!!
Smith: Awe.some will no doubt become the corner stone of the tag team division here in OCW.
Hood: There are only 2 teams. Kind of a weak division.
Bob: Shut up Hood! Matter of factly, I have top secret information about another team possibly showing up in OCW.
Hood: Oh really?
Bob: Yeah, So stop being a choad and enjoy the show.
We start with Ryan Hollywood throwing weak looking strikes at Ricky
Valdez, Ricky just laughs it off and whips Hollywood into the ropes,
hitting him with a nice clothesline. Ricky picks Ryan Hollywood up off
the ground and whips him into the corner, where he proceeds to hit
Hollywood with a stinger splash. Ricky climbs to the top rope waiting
for a dazed Ryan Hollywood get up and turn around, Ricky leaps and
connects with a diving cross body.
Bob: Very Impressive offense, Awe.Some is going places man.
Smith: Former Boardwalk Wrestling Tag Team Champions if I recall.
Ricky tags in his brother Randy who immediately picks Hollywood up and hits
an Inverted DDT. He picks him up again and Hollywood is completely
gassed. Randy, perhaps feeling a little bad for the poor fuck, pushes
him towards his own corner, Where is able to make a tag to the other
poor fuck, Hollywood Skyes. Skyes enters the ring like a house of fire..
NOT! He is dropped with a Koppu Kick. Skyes goes down hard. Ryan
Hollywood attempts to re-enter the ring and is cut off by Ricky, who
cracks him with a step up step up enzuigiri. With both opponents
incapacitated, Ricky and Randy play up to the cheering crowd. On the
outside of the ring Rachel Valdez opens a bag and begins handing out
those really annoying hand clapper things you had when you were a kid,
to everyone in the crowd. All you can hear is "Clack Clack Clack" over
and over again.
Hood: That is so fucking annoying.
Smith: It's Awe.Some! They enjoy getting the crowd involved. It's great for OCW!
Hood: Are you fucking smoking Weed right now?
Bob: Hey, it's my show, I'll do what I want.
Bob takes vicious halls of a nice glass bong while sitting at the announcers desk and Ricky
makes the tag to Randy. Randy, lifts and holds Hollywood Skyes in a
powerbomb position. The other team member, Ricky, then jumps from an
elevated position and dropkicks the opponent in the face. Once the loud
crack is heard, Randy then follows through with a powerbomb.
Smith: They call that the FACE POP!
Hood: I am not a man who is easily impressed, but that was pretty nice.
Bob: *Coughing*
Randy goes for the pin, and we realize there is no referee!
Hood: Who's the idiot who forgot to hire a referee?
Bob: I've been under a lot of stress. Sorry, I got this.
Bob gently removes his headset and puts his bong down. He climbs into the
ring to make the 3 count. The crowd cheers and Bob Grenier grabs a mic.
Bob: As if the result was ever in doubt, The winners of the match.. AWE.SOME!!
The crowd pops huge for this promising tag team. They head up the ramp to
the back slapping hands with the fans as they go. Bob makes his way back
to the booth and puts on his headset once again.
Hood: Aren't you just a jack of all trades tonight?
Bob: Host, Ring Announcer, Commentator, Referee, Next World Champion, I can do it all baby.
Smith: Greatest man Alive!
Bob: HEY! You smoking my weed Hood?
*Commercial*
Bob Grenier stands in the middle of the ring with a microphone.
Bob: Ladies and Gentleman, Tonight we celebrate a great man. A who man who
personifies what this business is all about. A noble man, A lover of
women, A slayer of vagina and the most incredible performer the industry
has ever seen.. All of a sudden the lights dim and a tribute video
begins to play on the screen set to the tune of "Dreams" by Fleetwood
Mac.
We see clips from Bob's OCW debut in April 2014. This was Total Demolition
where he battled PerZag, Richard and Vargas for the OCW Internet Title.
He nails his Hollinger Park Hangman on PerZag for his 4th pinfall in
this 10 minute match. He would come up just short, PerZag would win 5-4.
He sits on the mat in disbelief but not defeated.
Bob Grenier would become a staple of OCW programming. We see various clips from
Monday Night Massacre. Bob destroys a midget. He DDT's a sheep and
carries a defenseless Altera Moon away, She'd never be seen again.
Clash at the Coast is then featured. The main event featured a Steel Cage
Ladder Match between Chad Vargas, Bob Grenier and Scott Syren. Bob
Grenier stares down his two opponents with his fists balled. Grenier
stands between the ropes and the cage, he leaps up onto the ropes and
drop kicks a ladder into Scott Syren's face, busting him open. Rain
begins to fall and we see a desperate dive for the Belt hanging above,
he crashes through a table. He hit's his Hollinger Park Hangman from the
top of the ladder, and later tries to bore a whole through the cage
with a ladder to escape with the belt. He would come up short again, but
still does not feel defeated. Syren won that night.
July 7th 2014. Bob Grenier climbs the ladder and retrieves the OCW Internet
Championship, finally climbing the mountain. We see Bob turning his back
on everyone and joining PerZag to form Power & Worth. We see
highlights of vicious hammer attacks on 12 different wrestlers. At
Genesis, He would defend his title in an Internet Title on a Cross match
in Jerusalem. He hits a 450 Splash from the top of the cross and nearly
kills himself, that night his title is saved by Ian Bishop and Knox.
Friends of Power & Worth. He would lose the title to Legion 2 weeks later.
Finally we see clips of the Grenier/Vargas fued. They have a short lived tag
team known as "The Southsiders". We see clips of them refereeing each
others matches and screwing each other over at ever opportunity. We see
fist fights and arguments. Pure hatred. Chad Vargas throws Bob Grenier
off the top of the Green Monster in Fenway Park, It's a 330 foot drop.
The lights come back on.
Hood: Are you crying?
Smith: Leave me alone.
Bob is about to speak, when a mysterious hooded figure walks quickly
through the crowd. He pushes fans out of his way with a complete lack of
disregard for there safety. The hooded figure jumps the rail and makes a
dash for the ring. Bob looks confused.
Bob: I don't know who you are buddy, but the fans sit in the audience. You got no business in here.
The man takes his hood off. It's PerZag! He immediately demands a microphone and does not look happy!
PerZag: WHO ATTACKED ME OUTSIDE OF OCW HEADQUARTERS? I WANT TO KNOW RIGHT NOW! COME OUT HERE AND FACE ME!
Bob tries to calm down his former cohort and friend. PerZag grabs him by
the collar and backs him into the corner, Screaming that it was Bob who
attacked him. He hit's Grenier with a PerZag Perfection and slides
Grenier out of the ring.
PerZag: I WILL TEAR THIS PLACE APART!!
PerZag makes his way over to Hood and Smith. He grabs them both and tosses
them to the ground. Security rushes to the ringside area and PerZag
fights them off. He headbutts one Security guard and grabs another by
the neck, choking him out. Another security guard is given a PerZag
Perfection through the announce table.
PerZag: I WILL HURT EVERYBODY HERE, AND BURN THIS BUILDING TO THE GROUND, UNLESS I FIND OUT
RIGHT NOW WHO ATTACKED ME! SHOW YOUR FACE!
PerZag slides out of the ring and grabs a fan, he drags the fan into the ring and places him
the torture rack. He drops the fan and slides out of the ring again, he
grabs an elderly man and drags him over the guardrail and into the ring.
PerZag: I WILL BREAK THIS OLD MAN'S NECK, IF I DO NOT GET ANSWERS.
All of a sudden uniformed police officers storm the ring, Someone must have
called the police. PerZag releases the old man and retreats through the
crowd, he pushes fans out of the way as he is pelted with debris. We
cut to a commercial.
-------------------
A New Era...
You hear crowd chants: OH SEE DUBYA! OH SEE DUBYA!
A New Legacy To Be Had...
OH SEE DUBYA! OH SEE DUBYA!
Two teams...
Various shots of Itsumade and Puma rapidly fill your screen.
Various shots of Ricky and Randy applying hair gel fill your screen.
Two Choices...
You hear President Dean's voice echo:
"Gemini... or Twinsies."
"Gemini... or Twinsies."
"Gemini... or Twinsies."
One Obstacle...
Cut
to a empty room where a single rope hangs dramatically from the ceiling
to the floor. The shot zooms in slowly THEN QUICLY FOCUSES ON THE TOP
OF THE ROPE then backs away slowly LIGHTNING STRIKE!
Flicker-
Flicker-Flicker to-
Ricky and Randy Valdez are now standing by the rope looking super excited.
"Hey what's up everybody? Ricky Valdez here!"
"Randy Valdez too!"
"Come watch OCW history be made on February 28th!"
"That's right, because Awe.Some will be taking on... uhh... What does that cue card say?"
Randy squints.
"Our opponents."
"I get that. But I don't know how to pronounce that one dude's name. I don't want to offend him. A little help here?"
Randy looks at Ricky. Ricky just shrugs.
"Yeah, so come watch OCW history be made as Awe.Some takes on Our Opponents at Revenge!"
"First 200 fans at the gates get a free sample of hair gel!"
------------------------------------------
We come back from commercial to Hood and Smith at ringside. Due to the actions of one PerZag, they are without an announce table. A few chairs have been taken from the gallery and are being used as stands for the monitors.
Smith: Well were back, and I would like to apologize to our viewers and the people in attendance here tonight for the actions of PerZag. We at OCW do not condone the abuse of our fans, or the elderly.
Hood: The guy is a maniac.
Smith: Completely out of control.
Bob Grenier: I guarantee you that was not part of the show. Our fans are fantastic. Anyway, looks like I got more work to do.
Bob takes off his head set. He takes a nice amount of marijuana from the bag, now casually sitting on the ground and packs it into the glass bong. He takes a mighty rip and slides into the ring clutching a microphone.
Bob: (With the voice of an angel, or say, a greek god) Ladies and Gentleman, It's time for the main event of the evening. Introducing first from god knows fucking where, Weighing who gives a shit and standing I don't care, He's a man cranking out 5000 Word roleplays NO PROBLEM!!! The notorious, The ever so famous.. Gabrielllllllll Goodman
This loser walks through the curtain and down the entrance to some amusing circus music. Circus music because he is a complete clown. He stops in the middle of the aisle and flexes, kissing his non existent muscles. GG saunters to the ring like an idiot and trips on the bottom rope on the way in. Bob points and laughs, before kicking GG in the face. He picks GG up and comically pokes him in the eye. Bob picks up and takes down GG with a fisherman suplex.
Smith: Bob Grenier really taking it to his opponent here this evening.
Hood: It's Gabriel Goodman, Did you expect him to all of a sudden show up?
Smith: Touche.
Bob lifts GG onto his shoulders and hit's a death valley driver. He slides out of the ring and makes his way over to the announce table.
Bob: You're looking at the man who will take this company through 2015 and beyond, 2020, 2036, 2089, Who gives a fuck! OCW Baby!
Bob throws down his headset. GG, looking weak and disoriented from being fucked up by Bobby G, is up and he actually musters a faint punch, Bob takes a hilarious dive and pulls GG on top of himself for the pin, Bob makes the count, and it's only a 2, maybe 2.5
Smith: GG almost with the major upset! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!
Hood: This can't be sanctioned by OCW, can he referee his own match?
Smith: Who cares, It's hilarious!
Bob gloats and GG actually manages a small package. Bob attempts to get out of it.
Hood: 1,2,3,4,5,6. Bob just got beat by Gabriel Goodman!
Smith: He did not, that was a 2 count at best.
At about 6 Bob breaks free and unleashes a fury of punches. He lifts him high in the air and is about to drop him with the Hollinger Park Hangman when all of a sudden Chad Vargas appears on the screen. He is attempting to enter the building. Vargas is cut off by 2 security guards. He just head butts one in typical Vargas fashion and the other guard lets him walk right into the SportsPlex. He walks down the hall and stops at the concession.
Vargas: Hey, Gimme a Bud.
Cashier: We only have Molson Canadian, Sir.
The cashier hands him a can of beer and Vargas punches him hard in the face.
Vargas: Fuckin Canada, Well I ain't payin for it.
He takes a sip of the beer and you can tell by the look on his face he is actually kind of impressed. He takes a $20 out of his pocket and throws it to the cashier.
Vargas: Keep the change.
Vargas continues to look for his way to the ring. Back in the ring Bob has dropped GG with the Hollinger Park Hangman and is awaiting Chad's arrival. Chad Vargas walks through a curtain. He is on the ramp and Bob is in the ring with a microphone.
Bob: Can't get good security these fucking days can you?! Who let that piece of shit in the building?
They stare each other down and Vargas makes his way to the ring, not taking his eyes off his arch nemesis.
Bob: I knew, I just knew you'd be here tonight you goddamn choad!
Chad Vargas is approached from behind and bashed in the back of the leg with crowbars by 2 unknown men in ski masks. They quickly disappear.
Smith: For our viewing audience, shades of Tonya Harding there.
It was probably just some natives looking for drinkin money, you can pay the native folk to do pretty much anything up in the great white north of Canada. Vargas manages to get up and his leg doesn't appear that serious. He makes a dash for the ring and they begin throwing haymakers at each other, each one connecting. Vargas slams Grenier to the mat and begins violently kicking him in the ribs, Bob grabs his foot and manages to trip him up, He mounts Vargas and begins throwing punches. By this point both men are bleeding.
Hood: How does this end? I mean, Security is lacking around here and there is no referee, or any other personnel to intervene.
Smith: Just enjoy the preview my man!
Hood: Preview? Aren't they set to wrestle a traditional wrestling match? Look at them. I don't think that's going to happen.
Vargas and Grenier are up and continue throwing bombs at each other. Vargas hit's The Stroke in the middle of the ring. Bob is down and Vargas goes underneath the ring to fetch a chair. By the time he has what he is looking for, Bob is up, Vargas throws the chair at Grenier and it misses, Vargas re-enters the ring and Grenier exits, presumably to seek a weapon off his own, he finds his bong, he throws It at Vargas, missing. They actually both laugh for a moment as it lands on the mat in tact.
Smith: Cat and mouse right there.
Hood: That was kind of hilarious.
Grenier re-enters the ring and is met with a chair to the gut, Vargas brings it down across his back multiple times, sending Grenier to the mat. He hits him once in the back of the head and sets the chair on the mat, Vargas grabs the bong and smashes it over the back of Grenier's head, sending glass flying and opening a gash on the back of his head. He hits Bob with the stroke face first onto the steel chair! Although both men are bleeding, Bob is clearly the worse of the two. A pool of blood forms as he lays unconscious. Vargas doesn't seem to be done. He goes outside of the ring and gets another chair. Upon entering the ring he places the other chair on top of Grenier's head, creating a deadly sandwich. Vargas then grabs another chair an enters the ring again, with the intent to cause serious harm on an already battered Grenier.
Smith: No, No, No.
Hood: Too far, Way to far. We don't need anyone dying out here tonight.
Smith quickly takes off his headset and enters the ring to try and stop Vargas. Smith has a microphone.
Smith: Chad, Just think about what you're about to do. I know the hatred between you gentleman runs deep, but he's done. Save it for February 28th when the encounter actually means something. Look at him.
Smith points to Grenier who is bleeding heavily and completely unconscious. Vargas drops the chair and backs off, Showing a rare bit of compassion. He does however spit on Grenier before leaving, and bends down and whispers in his ear. "Stupid fucking Canuck". Vargas slowly walks up the ramp backwards, Watching as EMT's rush to Grenier's aid as the show goes off the air.