Post by Zombie Marcus on Jul 8, 2024 11:45:04 GMT -5
|+|The Yard|It’s nighttime and Zombie Marcus is seen rummaging through Zybala’s garbage, which has been placed in front of his driveway as pick-up day is tomorrow morning.|+|
"I wasn’t always like this."
|+|He looks up confused, wondering where that voice is coming from. |+|
"Relax Walker Texas Ranger, the voice you are hearing is inside your head. We can do this now, apparently…. We are, evolving? Or devolving from a walker, maybe to one day be our human selves again… Who knows… "
Zombie Marcus: Argh?
"What?"
Zombie Marcus: Arghar Argha Arghar?
"Oh, that, cuz we’re a walker, like, from The Walking Dead? And so, it ties is to this old Chuck Norris movie and show I use to watch and- "
Zombie Marcus: Ar’g arghar…
"It’s not stupid, that’s what we are… Zombies are so 1990’s."
Zombie Marcus: arg ar’g argh!
"Pfft, the 90’s sucked… "
|+|Zombie Marcus throws stuff all over the place frustrated, slapping his own head, and then, like any other zombie, err, walker out there, forgets because of his short attention span and goes back to looking for something ‘good’ to eat. Sadly, all he finds are endless empty cups of ramen noodle soup, shrimp flavor, diet coke cans, empty packages of something called ‘blue chew’ and various wrappers of ho-ho’s, twinkies and those nipple-looking bouncers… |+|
"ugh, disgusting Mikey. "
Zombie Marcus: Arg, argharghar!
"I know, that’s what I said."
|+|Angry he couldn’t find any meat, rotten or otherwise, Marcus goes on a Zombie frenzy and begins to throw Zybala’s trashcans all over the place, then working his way over the neighbors. Inside the house, we see a tired Zybala looking out the window, holding a crying baby. |+|
Zybala: YOU SON OF A BISCUIT! DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK TO-?!
|+|His wife comes over, places her hand on his shoulder, calming him down, and then takes the baby away as Zybala thanks her with a smile. He then pulls out his flip phone and angrily dials a number. |+|
Zybala: *ahem* Hey Paco, good evening, sorry to call you so late, can you please wake up your sons and tell them to par favor come get Marcus? Yeah, he got out again. No, he did not poop on my yard... wait, do Zombies poop? Yeah, I don’t know either… Anyway, great! Thanks amigo, buenos nachos.
|+|He puts his phone away as he looks out the window, Marcus is on his fifth house, causing a ruckus but none of the neighbors dare come out. Zybala shakes his head and then goes back to bed. Marcus appears to have found a bag of bbq bones which he begins to suck on as if they had any meat left. |+|
"Like I said I wasn’t always like this."
…Montage Time…
|+|Hola fans, it’s I, Vanessa Jimenez, manager and translator of The Malvado Brothers and now, narrator for Marcus, well, at least for these montages, there is only so much charity work I can do. Anyway, Marcus, son of the great “Punisher”, is shown from the moment he started his career in GCWA, when he had his debut match against three dudes named Scott Cain, Dangerous Dan and Mr. Excellent. No, I am not kidding, just like I’m not kidding when I show you him winning the Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship in that same match. Highlights from all his matches thereafter are shown, leading up to an Ironman match against Shane Donovan for the World Heavyweight Championship. That night, he would unify the titles. He would go on to have a stellar career in that fed, amounting 31 matches, we can’t show you all, but some. He then walks away from the business in 2010, feeling he had fulfilled his promise to his father. That’s a long story, and 2222 words aren’t going to do it justice, so we’ll end that montage with him walking away from the GCWA ring as the fans chant his name. We switch to a different montage, of his personal life, where he goes on to become a big tech mogul, building a multi-million-dollar cybersecurity empire but never marrying, having children or even a long-term relationship. Not even a one-night-stand? It would later be revealed that he was gay. |+|
"What?! No, I’m not gay!"
|+|Right… After 10 long years, and zero relationship highlights, we see him meet up with his long-lost crush, “Venom” Xavier Lux and-|+|
"WTF! Stop it! We’re just friends! We’re like brothers! Just stick to the damn script!"
|+|Uh-huh, deny all your jungle-fever feelings all you want, I know the truth. Anyway, they form the team of Sins of the Fathers, please don’t make me explain how they came up with that name. They join GCWA and are shown winning tag match after tag match, eventually winning the tag team championships in two separate occasions. Sadly, we see the promotion close and I was told to add here: “you suck Ace!” Whomever that is, so both wrestlers go their separate ways, Marcus is heartbroken and crying like a little bi- |+|
"Don’t!"
|+|Because the tag run was over, geez! After a year absence from the sport, we see him debut in TPW against his former partner, Xavier, defeating him in a brutal steel cage match.|+|
…End montage…
|+|It is with this win that he kickstarts his singles career, but it is here where the screen fades to black, as if you watched his first promo here in OCW, you know exactly what happened next...|+|
"I DIED! A former 2-time world and tag champion, 1-time intercontinental and Caribbean Cup champion and 1-time Hall of Famer, dead at 35 years old! And you know who’s to blame for my early demise? Terry F’n Marshall… A man I went to war for against my - "
|+|Lover.|+|
"PARTNER!"
|+|Exactly!|+|
"Tag team partner! Go away, montage is over. "
|+|Fine, toodles.|+|
"Thank you. I fought my own Deadly Sins brother for “Thundering” Terry, and he left me for dead in the past! So, it’s time for… "
Zombie Marcus: ARGHARGHA!
"Exactly, vengeance. Marshall, I lost my best friend over you and you didn’t care about my livelihood so I am coming to Dystopia 33, to ensure you don’t win it… I will try to get involved in that match and help Peter remain champion… So that you leave with your tail tucked between your legs, back to Clearwater or back to Huntington, whichever redneck backwoods you choose to live in, but where your brother can point at your sad face and laugh his ass off… But if you do manage to beat Peter Vaughn, I will be there, with my loose change piggy bank, ready to smash it on your stupid face, cash it in and take your newly won title! "
|+|The scene switches from Zombie Marcus to the bushes from a house down the street, behind them is the Hall of Fame tag team of The Malvado Brothers… in their care-bear pajamas… They are looking at Marcus, listening to his monologue.|+|
Zombie Marcus: Argh argh arghargh ar ar arg argh argha argha…
Hector: What you think he say bro?
Victor: No se, no hablo zombie…
Hector: Me either, vamos?
Victor: No yet.
|+|The camera switches back to Marcus |+|
"I know you won’t see this until after the pay-per-view is over, which fills me with joy even though my heart is not beating any more, because I can’t wait to see the look on that ridiculous bearded face of yours, when you see me coming down the aisle to take what you fought so hard against your brother to win. Then again, I might decide to hit you, or bite you, depending if I’m hungry or not, from behind, when you least expect it. "
Zombie Marcus: argh-arg!
Hector: No argh-arg for you puto!
|+|Zombie Marcus is surprised from behind by Hector who tries to put on the shock collar Vanessa uses to keep him under control. Zombie Marcus puts up his hands, stopping Hector and at the same time snapping at his mask, trying to take a bite out of it. Victor appears from behind, grabbing his arms, and locking them behind him. This allows Hector to put the collar on him and snap it locked. We hear buzzing and Marcus drops to all fours. |+|
"Oh Malvados, my forever keepers… My guard dogs… The ones who have sold their souls and for what? A Spanish announce table and some meat from the grill… A couple of coronas? How cliché… "
Zombie Marcus: *Sniff* arg arg ar arg argh… *sniff*
"How did we get here indeed…"
…Flashback time…
|+|‘Sup guys, I’m back! So this montage is about how during TPW’s Bohemiam Bash, he participated in the royal rumble match, and lost three body parts, a jaw, a foot and a hand… It shows his former tag team partner Xavier, going on a looooooove crusade, to get his partner’s body parts back from the marks at the show. It’s a great story, you should watch it, but the short story is, he recovered them, paid for the surgery to re-attach them with a lot of metal and also got him a cool collar that allowed Marcus to speak through it with the voice of Patrick Warburton, cool I know! But instead of thanking the surgeons, he ate them. He did thank Xavier, and the two made up, and tagged together and entered a tag-team turmoil match, in which 9 teams participated. They didn’t do well, as Marcus is not the same of course, and before the match Xavier spent all day chasing him as he went around a town eating people left and right and lost his collar. After the match was over, Xavier was done, put Marcus in a box and shipped him off to Paco, since after all, he is the manager of the 7 Deadly Sins. |+|
Paco: But I ain’t no baby sitter.
|+|Hey Paco! That’s right he isn’t, so he shipped that box right off to Douglas Crane, figuring, a person with a personality disorder was the perfect person, or people to take care of a Zombie. We see Crane opening the crate and letting Marcus out, but instead of containing him, preventing him from eating people, Crane did what he does best… Let the “monstrosity’ inside of him lose, and he was murdering people left and right with Marcus with those two cleavers he loves so much. Okay how is this guy not in jail? Or an asylum? I mean Marcus is a zombie, but him? What a psycho. Back to the story, we see Paco reaching out to Cholo to please step in and help, and so Marcus gets shipped off to Cholo. But Mr. “goodie-two-shoes” is too busy being a World Champion and taking care of all the children around the world, because he can’t have any of his own, he’s lacking machismo if you know what I mean… So, he can’t take care of a zombie or have him near all of those snot-nosed punks, so Marcus gets shipped right back to Paco. |+|
Paco: Mierda…
|+|Mucha mierda. So what does he do? What any normal parent would do, pass him off to his sons to take care of like a new toy and of course that means I have to step in and help… and that’s where the montage ends, at the end of his first promo here in OCW, with me putting a shock collar on him because hey, you may say that’s zombie-cruelty but that’s the only way we can get him to calm the hell down.|+|
…End Flashback…
"You’re a mean one, Mrs. Grinch. "
|+|And you’re a zombie that eats people, fudge off. OKAY BYE EVERYONE! The Malvados take Marcus towards their low-rider and toss him in the trunk. They pull away, heading home while Zombie Marcus, inside the trunk, is yapping away in his zombie talk.|+|
"One day I will take a big chunk out of Vanessa’s neck, bitch… What I am actually saying is that, Peter, if you can hear me, this has nothing to do with you. I know you and Xavier are friends, you and Cholo and The Malvados are friends, but don’t think you and I actually have ever interacted… If you happen to beat Terry at the match, you don’t have to worry about me coming after you and your title… I’m perfectly happy holding on to my little piggy friend until someone else becomes World Champion, or maybe go for one of the other titles… Though I honestly don’t care, it’s funny, dying has a way of not making you care about gold any more… Other things become a priority, like… "
|+|But just then, The Malvados don’t notice a bump on the road and hit it too fast, causing the back of their lo-lo to hit the ground and Marcus to slam against the top of the trunk popping it open. Marcus sits up and looks around… |+|
"A argh!"
|+|He throws himself off the car. The Malvados hit the brakes and then get out and look on as they see Marcus running away from them into the woods. |+|
Hector: He chasing a deer again isn’t he?
Victor: Vanessa nos va a matar.
|+|To be continued…|+|
