Post by Natural ICE Beckman on Mar 1, 2023 14:36:09 GMT -5
“Life is handing me lemons, and I am currently drowning in lemonade.”
History Lesson Part 1
(We fade slowly in from black to the sounds of gun shots, police sirens, and Tainted Love by Soft Cell plays. The cold of the air matches the cold-hearted atmosphere in which we find ourselves...
Sometime early 1980s New York City
Steam escapes the sewers as the lights of the city reflect off the wet city streets. Stepping through the steam is a women dressed in a little black dress with a lot of big proportions. A limousine comes pulling up along the curb. Once it comes to a stop, the chauffeur gets out the front, walks to the back of the limo and opens the back door for the women to enter.)
Women: I take it you we’re able to get away from the wife.
(She longingly looks over at a man who resembles our hero, yet a little bit older, a little bit wiser, and a lot eviler. He puts down his crystal glass of bourbon, before sliding the women closer to him with one arm and wrapping the other arm around her shoulders.)
Man: I told her I had to attend a fundraiser for the disease that Webster kid has.
Women: Well Mr. Boss, whatever you told her, I am glad you are here now.
(The attractive young woman leans in for a very passionate kiss as the limo heads towards the closest 5-star hotel.)
The ICE Rage Age
(Johnny, PJ, and Dee aren’t even feeling the icy cold breeze coming off Foam Lake. They all have worried expressions as they head towards Natural ICE Beckman’s cabin.)
PJ: It’s never good when he struggles in the ring.
DEE: He always has some sort of insane freak out.
Johnny: In the past, there’s been devilish arson, irrational kidnappings, and something he called, wildlife fight club.
(Just as they are about to approach the front step ICE pops out of the cabin with a smile on his face and a spring in his step.)
ICE: Time to learn from past mistakes, admit my short comings, and refocus on what the people really want, lots and lots of Natural ICE Beckman. And that is what they are going to get. From the worst moments of my past, the ones that have created the darkest shadows in my mind...to the most beautiful blessings of my life, then ones that created the confidence in my smile.
(ICE opens his truck’s door but looks back to his confused friends.)
ICE: And one thing is for sure fucking true, the whole fucking OCW world definitely knows the name Natural ICE Beckman. So, from where I am standing, step one is complete.
(ICE climbs into his truck and drives off, leaving the ICE crew at his cabin’s front door.)
Johnny: Do you smell something?
PJ: Yeah, confidence.
DEE: He’s not talking about ICE; he’s talking about smoke.
(Johnny and PJ follow Dee’s eyesight as they investigate the cabin to see the therapeutic chaos in which ICE Beckman came from. The place is a total wreck, a man is struggling to free himself of his duct tape bindings, and multiple furniture items are on fire.)
Johnny: On second thought, the wicker furniture was a bad idea.
DEE: Did he kidnap the mailman?
(PJ removes a piece of tape from the Mailman’s mouth.)
Mailman: All I said to him was “Have a Nice Day.” Now, let me out of here before the beast returns.
PJ: Don’t worry, ICE drove away.
Mailman: I’m talking about the bear!
(Just then a fucking grizzly comes roaring out from a bedroom! Johnny, Dee and PJ begin to high tail it out of the cabin.)
Mailman: Wait! Don’t forget me!
PJ: Oh sorry.
(PJ places the piece of tape back over the poor civil servants' mouth, before following Dee and Johnny out the exit. Amid muffled screams of terror, the scene comes to an end.)
Ms. Blakely’s Neighborhood
(The television program fades down from the clouds onto a miniature town. The camera pans over the little model rooftops until it finds Barbie’s dream house. The show switches to an inside shot as Ms. Blakely walks into the house.)
Ms. Blakely: Welcome kids, you are special, the world is special, I am special.
(Mari suddenly bursts through the door.)
Ms. Blakely: Why if it isn’t my dear friend, Mari Vilaro.
Mari: I’m not your friend, you’re my cash cow. Speaking of that, you’re looking fat.
Ms. Blakely: I’ve puked three times today. Remember kids, a skinny body is a healthy body.
Mari: I’m here with your Vilaro shakes. You must sell at least 500 units this Month.
Ms. Blakely: I’ll do anything for a friend like you.
Mari: I’m not your friend; I’m your distributor.
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids, only beautiful people deserve friends like Mari.
Mari: The only place where we are friends is in your dreams.
(Mari exits the house while laughing at Ms. Blakely.)
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids, dreams can be fun, like when I joined OCW, but they can also be painful, like when I joined OCW.
(Just then in from poolside comes Hottie.)
Ms. Blakely: Well, if it isn’t my bestest friend. How was your swim?
Hottie: Sucky, because you don't have an infinity pool?
Ms. Blakely: Sorry babe, want to come hold hands with me?
Hottie: I’d rather hold a drink.
Ms. Blakely: I know we don’t have the traditional manager and wrestler lifestyle.
Hottie: You can say that again.
Ms. Blakely: But maybe it would be nice if you booked me a match.
Hottie: I did, I had to pull some strings, but I got you a sweet match-up against ICE.
Ms. Blakely: Oh, he’s tough, and strong.
Hottie: And don’t forget, he’s way more talented than you.
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids, challenges help you grow.
Hottie: Well, you better grow a shit ton before Massacre if you want to beat ICE.
Ms. Blakely: I see it is almost time for us to say goodbye.
Hottie: Really? We can finally break up? Oh wait, you’re talking about the show.
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids, you are special, the world is special, and...I am special.
Hootie: Eh, not that special.
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids...(holding back tears)...it's okay to cry.
(Ms. Blakely puts her hands down into the palms of her hands as she sobs the show to a close.)
ICE’s Blast from Johnny’s Past
(Johnny Beckman walks into the cabin’s kitchen door to find his brother sorting the recycling.)
ICE: You know if you must sort pony kegs and regular kegs?
Johnny: I think a single pile for all kegs should be fine.
(Johnny begins to take off his long black coat and fine leather gloves.)
Johnny: You know Natural, I am very impressed how quickly you have calmed down after the last two OCW shows.
ICE: I had a little help with that.
(There is a very light knock at the door.)
Johnny: Who is that?
ICE: My little help.
(ICE opens the door and a gorgeous foxy redhead comes walking into the cabin.)
Johnny: Annie?
Annie: Oh, Hi there, JB.
Johnny: My Annie?
ICE: Oh yeah, you two did use to date.
Annie: And I was his manager for his wrestling... “Career”.
Johnny: I was a title holder!
ICE: Didn’t you buy that title from a meth head?
Johnny: It was a sanctioned title, and I obtained it. What the hell is this?
Annie: ICE baby called me the other night; said he needed some fun and I was the girl for the job.
ICE: And she got the job done alright.
Annie: Many times, actually.
(Annie giggles at ICE who flashes her a smile in return.)
Annie: Well, we gotta go.
(Annie gives Johnny a little wave, before ICE grabs her by the waist and leads her out the door without even giving his brother a second thought. Johnny stands there a moment in pure shock when PJ comes walking in from the cold.)
PJ: Wow, that chick with ICE is super-hot. Hey, didn’t you use to date a red head?
Johnny: That is the Red Head I used to date!
(Johnny knocks PJ out of his way as he storms out of the kitchen. PJ regains himself as his pure joy creates a smile on his chubby cheeks.)
PJ: ICE is so cool.
(The black fades in as you hear Johnny ranting in the background about his missing Golf Digest magazine and how fucking sick he is of winter.)
Bombing the Bombshell while Bombed
(ICE leans back against the ice-fishing house wall. His boots may rest on empty beer cans, but his mind is racing on thoughts of violence.)
ICE: Failure is not fun, it is ugly, it is painful, and for me, it is the truth. A truth I’ve begun to embrace. I’ve proven many things in my short time here at OCW. I’m the brightest new blip on the wrestling world radar. I know how to dish out pain, you could say for me, it comes naturally. And finally, in between those ropes and behind the microphone, the sky is truly my fucking limit.
(He pulls the hard stuff out from his tackle box for a big boy drink.)
ICE: And now to Brooke Blakely. You remember me, right? I was the one who tossed you out of the ring in the Artic Rumble. Truly strong reasoning of why I will beat you. But those who live in the past are merely echos on the wind. Since coming to OCW, I’ve seen plenty of those echos come and go with nothing but more than a faint pulse of fanfare. Our match this week is about the future; it is a brand-new blank canvass that I will use to create my next masterpiece. Your blood will be my medium and my hate will me my muse. And we’ve all seen the comics, I am a funny guy. But after the world sees how badly I hurt you, only your true enemies will be smiling. Everyone else will be horrified, not because of your new off-putting scars, but because they understand that they could be next.
(He searches the tackle box for his next high. He pulls out a joint laced with good times and bad decisions.)
ICE: You’re a cardboard cutout with a child’s perspective on a very real situation. Welsh is using you as a speed bump in my career. But no big deal, based on your personality, I bet you’ve been run over plenty of times. Now here is your reality check; you’re a lot of nothing wrapped in a shiny package. I am going to push you down off your high hopes. I am going to grind your confidence into shame. I am going to tarnish your dream of being a wrestler into a real-life nightmare. By the end of our match, it’ll be a whole new world for you princess, and all the pep talks and training sessions won’t ever make you shine again.
(ICE stumbles to his feet, tosses his joint into the fishing hole, and heads out into the night.)
History Lesson Part 2
(We fade back to NYC in the 80’s to a very similar scene as before. The air is still bitter, the steam still escapes the streets, and a limo waits along the curb. Out from the steam steps the same woman, but this time she is holding something very special. The man comes out from the limo and rushes over to her.)
Man: Last time I spoke with you was 8 months ago when you suddenly quit.
Woman: Here is the reason for that. Say hi to your son.
(The woman shows the man her very handsome baby. The man is only taken a back for a moment before snapping into action.)
Man: We need to immediately hide this baby from my wife.
Woman: I want money.
Man: You’ll get yours eventually. But for now...JEEVES!!
(The chauffeur pops out from the driver’s seat.)
Man: Call the airport, we need to charter a flight to Wisconsin, I have family there.
(The man ushers the woman and his new son into the back of the limousine as “Don’t You (Forget about Me) by Simple Minds plays the promo to an end.)
“At Massacre, life’s lemonade is being served ICE cold.”
History Lesson Part 1
(We fade slowly in from black to the sounds of gun shots, police sirens, and Tainted Love by Soft Cell plays. The cold of the air matches the cold-hearted atmosphere in which we find ourselves...
Sometime early 1980s New York City
Steam escapes the sewers as the lights of the city reflect off the wet city streets. Stepping through the steam is a women dressed in a little black dress with a lot of big proportions. A limousine comes pulling up along the curb. Once it comes to a stop, the chauffeur gets out the front, walks to the back of the limo and opens the back door for the women to enter.)
Women: I take it you we’re able to get away from the wife.
(She longingly looks over at a man who resembles our hero, yet a little bit older, a little bit wiser, and a lot eviler. He puts down his crystal glass of bourbon, before sliding the women closer to him with one arm and wrapping the other arm around her shoulders.)
Man: I told her I had to attend a fundraiser for the disease that Webster kid has.
Women: Well Mr. Boss, whatever you told her, I am glad you are here now.
(The attractive young woman leans in for a very passionate kiss as the limo heads towards the closest 5-star hotel.)
The ICE Rage Age
(Johnny, PJ, and Dee aren’t even feeling the icy cold breeze coming off Foam Lake. They all have worried expressions as they head towards Natural ICE Beckman’s cabin.)
PJ: It’s never good when he struggles in the ring.
DEE: He always has some sort of insane freak out.
Johnny: In the past, there’s been devilish arson, irrational kidnappings, and something he called, wildlife fight club.
(Just as they are about to approach the front step ICE pops out of the cabin with a smile on his face and a spring in his step.)
ICE: Time to learn from past mistakes, admit my short comings, and refocus on what the people really want, lots and lots of Natural ICE Beckman. And that is what they are going to get. From the worst moments of my past, the ones that have created the darkest shadows in my mind...to the most beautiful blessings of my life, then ones that created the confidence in my smile.
(ICE opens his truck’s door but looks back to his confused friends.)
ICE: And one thing is for sure fucking true, the whole fucking OCW world definitely knows the name Natural ICE Beckman. So, from where I am standing, step one is complete.
(ICE climbs into his truck and drives off, leaving the ICE crew at his cabin’s front door.)
Johnny: Do you smell something?
PJ: Yeah, confidence.
DEE: He’s not talking about ICE; he’s talking about smoke.
(Johnny and PJ follow Dee’s eyesight as they investigate the cabin to see the therapeutic chaos in which ICE Beckman came from. The place is a total wreck, a man is struggling to free himself of his duct tape bindings, and multiple furniture items are on fire.)
Johnny: On second thought, the wicker furniture was a bad idea.
DEE: Did he kidnap the mailman?
(PJ removes a piece of tape from the Mailman’s mouth.)
Mailman: All I said to him was “Have a Nice Day.” Now, let me out of here before the beast returns.
PJ: Don’t worry, ICE drove away.
Mailman: I’m talking about the bear!
(Just then a fucking grizzly comes roaring out from a bedroom! Johnny, Dee and PJ begin to high tail it out of the cabin.)
Mailman: Wait! Don’t forget me!
PJ: Oh sorry.
(PJ places the piece of tape back over the poor civil servants' mouth, before following Dee and Johnny out the exit. Amid muffled screams of terror, the scene comes to an end.)
Ms. Blakely’s Neighborhood
(The television program fades down from the clouds onto a miniature town. The camera pans over the little model rooftops until it finds Barbie’s dream house. The show switches to an inside shot as Ms. Blakely walks into the house.)
Ms. Blakely: Welcome kids, you are special, the world is special, I am special.
(Mari suddenly bursts through the door.)
Ms. Blakely: Why if it isn’t my dear friend, Mari Vilaro.
Mari: I’m not your friend, you’re my cash cow. Speaking of that, you’re looking fat.
Ms. Blakely: I’ve puked three times today. Remember kids, a skinny body is a healthy body.
Mari: I’m here with your Vilaro shakes. You must sell at least 500 units this Month.
Ms. Blakely: I’ll do anything for a friend like you.
Mari: I’m not your friend; I’m your distributor.
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids, only beautiful people deserve friends like Mari.
Mari: The only place where we are friends is in your dreams.
(Mari exits the house while laughing at Ms. Blakely.)
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids, dreams can be fun, like when I joined OCW, but they can also be painful, like when I joined OCW.
(Just then in from poolside comes Hottie.)
Ms. Blakely: Well, if it isn’t my bestest friend. How was your swim?
Hottie: Sucky, because you don't have an infinity pool?
Ms. Blakely: Sorry babe, want to come hold hands with me?
Hottie: I’d rather hold a drink.
Ms. Blakely: I know we don’t have the traditional manager and wrestler lifestyle.
Hottie: You can say that again.
Ms. Blakely: But maybe it would be nice if you booked me a match.
Hottie: I did, I had to pull some strings, but I got you a sweet match-up against ICE.
Ms. Blakely: Oh, he’s tough, and strong.
Hottie: And don’t forget, he’s way more talented than you.
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids, challenges help you grow.
Hottie: Well, you better grow a shit ton before Massacre if you want to beat ICE.
Ms. Blakely: I see it is almost time for us to say goodbye.
Hottie: Really? We can finally break up? Oh wait, you’re talking about the show.
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids, you are special, the world is special, and...I am special.
Hootie: Eh, not that special.
Ms. Blakely: Remember kids...(holding back tears)...it's okay to cry.
(Ms. Blakely puts her hands down into the palms of her hands as she sobs the show to a close.)
ICE’s Blast from Johnny’s Past
(Johnny Beckman walks into the cabin’s kitchen door to find his brother sorting the recycling.)
ICE: You know if you must sort pony kegs and regular kegs?
Johnny: I think a single pile for all kegs should be fine.
(Johnny begins to take off his long black coat and fine leather gloves.)
Johnny: You know Natural, I am very impressed how quickly you have calmed down after the last two OCW shows.
ICE: I had a little help with that.
(There is a very light knock at the door.)
Johnny: Who is that?
ICE: My little help.
(ICE opens the door and a gorgeous foxy redhead comes walking into the cabin.)
Johnny: Annie?
Annie: Oh, Hi there, JB.
Johnny: My Annie?
ICE: Oh yeah, you two did use to date.
Annie: And I was his manager for his wrestling... “Career”.
Johnny: I was a title holder!
ICE: Didn’t you buy that title from a meth head?
Johnny: It was a sanctioned title, and I obtained it. What the hell is this?
Annie: ICE baby called me the other night; said he needed some fun and I was the girl for the job.
ICE: And she got the job done alright.
Annie: Many times, actually.
(Annie giggles at ICE who flashes her a smile in return.)
Annie: Well, we gotta go.
(Annie gives Johnny a little wave, before ICE grabs her by the waist and leads her out the door without even giving his brother a second thought. Johnny stands there a moment in pure shock when PJ comes walking in from the cold.)
PJ: Wow, that chick with ICE is super-hot. Hey, didn’t you use to date a red head?
Johnny: That is the Red Head I used to date!
(Johnny knocks PJ out of his way as he storms out of the kitchen. PJ regains himself as his pure joy creates a smile on his chubby cheeks.)
PJ: ICE is so cool.
(The black fades in as you hear Johnny ranting in the background about his missing Golf Digest magazine and how fucking sick he is of winter.)
Bombing the Bombshell while Bombed
(ICE leans back against the ice-fishing house wall. His boots may rest on empty beer cans, but his mind is racing on thoughts of violence.)
ICE: Failure is not fun, it is ugly, it is painful, and for me, it is the truth. A truth I’ve begun to embrace. I’ve proven many things in my short time here at OCW. I’m the brightest new blip on the wrestling world radar. I know how to dish out pain, you could say for me, it comes naturally. And finally, in between those ropes and behind the microphone, the sky is truly my fucking limit.
(He pulls the hard stuff out from his tackle box for a big boy drink.)
ICE: And now to Brooke Blakely. You remember me, right? I was the one who tossed you out of the ring in the Artic Rumble. Truly strong reasoning of why I will beat you. But those who live in the past are merely echos on the wind. Since coming to OCW, I’ve seen plenty of those echos come and go with nothing but more than a faint pulse of fanfare. Our match this week is about the future; it is a brand-new blank canvass that I will use to create my next masterpiece. Your blood will be my medium and my hate will me my muse. And we’ve all seen the comics, I am a funny guy. But after the world sees how badly I hurt you, only your true enemies will be smiling. Everyone else will be horrified, not because of your new off-putting scars, but because they understand that they could be next.
(He searches the tackle box for his next high. He pulls out a joint laced with good times and bad decisions.)
ICE: You’re a cardboard cutout with a child’s perspective on a very real situation. Welsh is using you as a speed bump in my career. But no big deal, based on your personality, I bet you’ve been run over plenty of times. Now here is your reality check; you’re a lot of nothing wrapped in a shiny package. I am going to push you down off your high hopes. I am going to grind your confidence into shame. I am going to tarnish your dream of being a wrestler into a real-life nightmare. By the end of our match, it’ll be a whole new world for you princess, and all the pep talks and training sessions won’t ever make you shine again.
(ICE stumbles to his feet, tosses his joint into the fishing hole, and heads out into the night.)
History Lesson Part 2
(We fade back to NYC in the 80’s to a very similar scene as before. The air is still bitter, the steam still escapes the streets, and a limo waits along the curb. Out from the steam steps the same woman, but this time she is holding something very special. The man comes out from the limo and rushes over to her.)
Man: Last time I spoke with you was 8 months ago when you suddenly quit.
Woman: Here is the reason for that. Say hi to your son.
(The woman shows the man her very handsome baby. The man is only taken a back for a moment before snapping into action.)
Man: We need to immediately hide this baby from my wife.
Woman: I want money.
Man: You’ll get yours eventually. But for now...JEEVES!!
(The chauffeur pops out from the driver’s seat.)
Man: Call the airport, we need to charter a flight to Wisconsin, I have family there.
(The man ushers the woman and his new son into the back of the limousine as “Don’t You (Forget about Me) by Simple Minds plays the promo to an end.)
“At Massacre, life’s lemonade is being served ICE cold.”