Seeking OCW wrestlers seeking a Second Chance at life

[Second Chance Ranch]

A stage is setup in front of the Columbus, Ohio courthouse. Cornelius Cook, recognizable to OCW fans as the lawyer from the Kenny Trial in Bifford promotional materials, stands on the stage. A few reporters are there and several people with cameras have gathered around.

Cornelius: The verdict rendered here today was unjust and will be looked back upon as a dark day in this nation's history. But that is not why I am here today.. I am here today because I am contractually obligated to open this envelope and read its contents to you. I was given this envelope by The Big Bifford before he left to go to Antarctica "in case" Kenny was found guilty..

Cornelius opens the envelope, clears his throat, and begins reading the letter found inside.

Cornelius: The criminal justice system has failed us today, just as it has many times in the past. I myself, The Big Bifford, have spent time in prison. It is a cruel fate for many innocent people. For this reason, I have purchased a large mass of rural land in Wood County of West Virginia. There I will begin a community, The Second Chance Ranch. If you've been falsely accused of a crime, or have other issues fitting in with normalized society.. are disenfranchised, or you just need some new friends, you're welcome. 

Cornelius continues reading.

Cornelius: The promotional department... has.. put together a video. What the hell?! Does that damn promotional department just expect that Kenny would be found guilty?

Another man comes to the side of the stage and hisses, "stick to the script," in a thick Russian accent. 

Cornelius: The promtional department has put together a video to explain the glories of The Second Chance Ranch. I, Cornelius Cook, will be personally movi- hold on, I ain't moving to West Virginia.

The man with the Russian accent comes back to the side of the stage and hisses something inaudible to the home viewer. 

Cornelius: I'll read it, but..

More hissing came in the lawyer's direction from the Russian.

Cornelius: I, Cornelius Cook, will be personally moving to the property and will assist and offer... offer.. offer free legal.. free legal help.. 

The lawyer begins hyperventilating. 

Cornelius: To all who seek a second chance.. this is how.. I will.. repay the world for losing this trial that I clearly should have won..

It is obviously causing the lawyer a lot of personal pain to read this, realizing his life is in very real danger. 

Cornelius: Enjoy the video and I hope to see you in West Virginia.. 

Cornelius starts walking off the stage where he's met by an angry looking Russian nerd. Long time OCW fans might recognize him as Boris the Cannibal, who grabs Cornelius by the arm and leads him roughly away.