Sorry, Charlie. I love you
Dec 28, 2022 1:27:04 GMT -5
Marcus Welsh, Thunder Knuckles, and 1 more like this
Post by Crash Rodriguez on Dec 28, 2022 1:27:04 GMT -5
My eyes are glued to my sons smiling face as he stares intently at the enclosed Gorillas. His smile warms me, and my heart feels like its growing. A familiar ffeeling I’ve not felt since she passed away. That unconditional love. I watch as Bash starts banging on the glass and babbling, trying to command the beasts into action.
“Relax Bash, the monkeys are sleeping. Let’s go look at something else.”
I doubt he understood a word I said, but he definitely has erupted into anger as he bangs and screams at the glass, waking a large Silverback resting close by. As the primate rises to their feet it begins banging its chest and roaring, sending Bash on the run, shrieking as tears roll down his cheek. I march up to the glass, my eyes locked on with the gorilla.
“Listen up you roided up Curious George, you fuck with my kid again and I’ll come through this glass and make you my bitch.”
The gorilla snarls as he stands his ground, his eyes staring daggers at me, when suddenly he smashes his arms against the glass. I feel my body turn to stone, as my hands ball into fists. He watches me, his eyes looking me over, looking for any sign of intimidation and coming up empty. I turn my attention to Bash, as he clings to my leg. As I turn my attention back to the animal, I notice a small baby clinging to their leg.
“I get it. Fellow parent myself.”
The gorilla nods as they lift their child and head to the far corner to resume their nap.
“Did you just relate to a primate?”
“Parenting is instinctual.”
“I just can’t believe that the only living creature that understands you is a fucking oversized Gorilla.”
I calm myself, restraining from yelling in front of the boy.
“Don’t you have some shady phone call to be taking?”
I notice Lou’s eyes turn to saucers, as he takes a big gulp. (Get your own Big Gulp at your local 7Eleven)
“Yeah, I’m not an idiot. You’ve been on the phone acting all shady for nearly a month. Whats going on with that? Who are you talking to?”
“Well, you see, I’ve been talking to Jacki O’Lantern’s mom, and she’s an honest to God FREA-“
“You think I’m an idiot? You’re doing something, and it isn’t a mom this time. So you can tell me now, or-“
Before I can finish my questioning Lou’s phone begins to ring. He pulls it out and looks up at me. His eyes say it all, it's definitely the same caller he's been talking to. I watch him weigh whether or not he should take the call, but what astonishes me is his response.
“Just let me take this call, I’ll explain everything later. Why dont you take Bash to see some more animals. Maybe he’ll like the penguins, yenno cause they both waddle around.”
Lou flashes a sheepish smile as he turns and departs.
“You have the worst timing. What's going on? … Really? … I told you, we had this in the bag. With me in your corner anything is possible…”
Lou’s rant continues as he finally exits out of hearing distance. I shake my head as I lift up Bash and head towards the next exhibit.
“Let’s go buddy. These gorillas are as disappointing as Charlie. Remember when he lost to Sahara? How the hell did he manage that? I beat her and I hardly even tried…”
Bash babbles back at me, mimicking conversation.
“Yeah, I know. Charlie’s a pretty ugly guy. But I mean he’s not just stupid and ugly. Deep down that man understands what it means to be a Bastard.”
I shake my head as I realize the absurdity of this whole exchange.
“Let’s go see some more animals.”
I carry him along the path of the Kansas City Zoo, still surprised they are open this time of year. I check his coat to make sure it’s still zipped up when I notice he's missing a shoe. A heavy sigh leaves my lungs.
“You and those damned shoes.”
I turn around and head back towards the gorilla exhibit when I see something that makes my heart stop.
“Hola Mijo”
I stare at the man, noticing my son's lost shoe sitting in the palm of his hands. My eyes swing back to focusing on his face. I feel my blood boiling in my veins as my heart begins to pound like an African tribal drum.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
“Tis the season. I assumed my christmas invite got lost in the mail.”
“You didnt get an invite, because you’re dead to me.”
I pull the shoe from his hands, and begin to walk away.
“Don’t be that way, mijo. Sure, I made some mistakes but-“
“You didn't exist in my life til Mom died and you were stuck with me. Then you decided to make my life a living hell. I still carry the scars, inside and out. You made some mistakes? You were the mistake.”
I march away, willing to go anywhere he isn’t.
“I just wanted to tell you how proud I am.”
My feet turn to lead, bringing me to a halt. I feel my heart try to crawl out of my chest. Those words. Hearing him say he’s proud of me. It’s all I ever wanted to hear. I turn around, staring him face to face.
“Why the fuck would I care if you’re proud or not.”
“You have all the reasons to hate me, but look at where you are now. You’ve been a champion, and now you are on your way to winning another. You are listed as one of the top 5 future main eventers in your company. You are a part of the most dominant forces in the industry. To top it off, you are an amazing father.”
“And with no help from you.”
“Oh mijo, it’s all because of me. I made you strong. I made you smart.”
“You made me a mess. Left me with broken shards to piece back together.”
“But I gave you the tools to do it.”
“If you’re here to get a thank you, you're going to be wildly disappointed when you end up unconscious in a hospital bed.”
I rush off away from my father, and towards the gift shop. I walk inside, my mind still clouded by my rage. I lower Bash to his feet, and he quickly takes off towards a wall of hoodies. I breathe slowly, inhaling and exhaling heavily as I slowly bring myself together.
“Hey kid, so what animal did you and the shit machine go see?”
“A jackass.”
Lou stands puzzled for a second.
“You went to see the donkeys? Why? Of all the animals to see in a zoo, and you go look at farm animals? Jesus Christ. Come on, grab the boy and let's go look at those penguins.”
I follow behind Lou, as Bash squirms in my arms, his gaze jumping from one exciting thing to the next. My mind continues to wander back to the encounter with my father. He looked so pitiful standing there. Like he truly regretted it all, but too little too late. I’ve done fine without him, and I plan to keep that going.
“So, any plans for Nickleman?”
Lou breaks me from my train of thought, bringing me back to reality.
“Beat him.”
“Not gonna choke like any other time you fight a friend?”
“Charlie is a good guy. Well, maybe not ‘good’, but he makes me laugh. Yet he’s standing in my way.”
“So just like that, Brotherhood goes out the window.”
“The man is sick and depraved. Once he's in that ring and the bell rings, it doesn’t matter who’s in the other corner.”
Lou nods as we walk into the penguin exhibit. Bash’s smile grows two-fold as he spots the little flightless birds swimming through the glass. He claps his hands together in excitement as he wiggles himself free. His feet patter as he approaches the glass.
“He’s a good kid. I just want you to know, whatever other shit you’ve been going through, you’re a great father. I’m proud of you.”
I feel a tear build in my eye, before I blink it away.
“Thanks Lou”
“Relax Bash, the monkeys are sleeping. Let’s go look at something else.”
I doubt he understood a word I said, but he definitely has erupted into anger as he bangs and screams at the glass, waking a large Silverback resting close by. As the primate rises to their feet it begins banging its chest and roaring, sending Bash on the run, shrieking as tears roll down his cheek. I march up to the glass, my eyes locked on with the gorilla.
“Listen up you roided up Curious George, you fuck with my kid again and I’ll come through this glass and make you my bitch.”
The gorilla snarls as he stands his ground, his eyes staring daggers at me, when suddenly he smashes his arms against the glass. I feel my body turn to stone, as my hands ball into fists. He watches me, his eyes looking me over, looking for any sign of intimidation and coming up empty. I turn my attention to Bash, as he clings to my leg. As I turn my attention back to the animal, I notice a small baby clinging to their leg.
“I get it. Fellow parent myself.”
The gorilla nods as they lift their child and head to the far corner to resume their nap.
“Did you just relate to a primate?”
“Parenting is instinctual.”
“I just can’t believe that the only living creature that understands you is a fucking oversized Gorilla.”
I calm myself, restraining from yelling in front of the boy.
“Don’t you have some shady phone call to be taking?”
I notice Lou’s eyes turn to saucers, as he takes a big gulp. (Get your own Big Gulp at your local 7Eleven)
“Yeah, I’m not an idiot. You’ve been on the phone acting all shady for nearly a month. Whats going on with that? Who are you talking to?”
“Well, you see, I’ve been talking to Jacki O’Lantern’s mom, and she’s an honest to God FREA-“
“You think I’m an idiot? You’re doing something, and it isn’t a mom this time. So you can tell me now, or-“
Before I can finish my questioning Lou’s phone begins to ring. He pulls it out and looks up at me. His eyes say it all, it's definitely the same caller he's been talking to. I watch him weigh whether or not he should take the call, but what astonishes me is his response.
“Just let me take this call, I’ll explain everything later. Why dont you take Bash to see some more animals. Maybe he’ll like the penguins, yenno cause they both waddle around.”
Lou flashes a sheepish smile as he turns and departs.
“You have the worst timing. What's going on? … Really? … I told you, we had this in the bag. With me in your corner anything is possible…”
Lou’s rant continues as he finally exits out of hearing distance. I shake my head as I lift up Bash and head towards the next exhibit.
“Let’s go buddy. These gorillas are as disappointing as Charlie. Remember when he lost to Sahara? How the hell did he manage that? I beat her and I hardly even tried…”
Bash babbles back at me, mimicking conversation.
“Yeah, I know. Charlie’s a pretty ugly guy. But I mean he’s not just stupid and ugly. Deep down that man understands what it means to be a Bastard.”
I shake my head as I realize the absurdity of this whole exchange.
“Let’s go see some more animals.”
I carry him along the path of the Kansas City Zoo, still surprised they are open this time of year. I check his coat to make sure it’s still zipped up when I notice he's missing a shoe. A heavy sigh leaves my lungs.
“You and those damned shoes.”
I turn around and head back towards the gorilla exhibit when I see something that makes my heart stop.
“Hola Mijo”
I stare at the man, noticing my son's lost shoe sitting in the palm of his hands. My eyes swing back to focusing on his face. I feel my blood boiling in my veins as my heart begins to pound like an African tribal drum.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
“Tis the season. I assumed my christmas invite got lost in the mail.”
“You didnt get an invite, because you’re dead to me.”
I pull the shoe from his hands, and begin to walk away.
“Don’t be that way, mijo. Sure, I made some mistakes but-“
“You didn't exist in my life til Mom died and you were stuck with me. Then you decided to make my life a living hell. I still carry the scars, inside and out. You made some mistakes? You were the mistake.”
I march away, willing to go anywhere he isn’t.
“I just wanted to tell you how proud I am.”
My feet turn to lead, bringing me to a halt. I feel my heart try to crawl out of my chest. Those words. Hearing him say he’s proud of me. It’s all I ever wanted to hear. I turn around, staring him face to face.
“Why the fuck would I care if you’re proud or not.”
“You have all the reasons to hate me, but look at where you are now. You’ve been a champion, and now you are on your way to winning another. You are listed as one of the top 5 future main eventers in your company. You are a part of the most dominant forces in the industry. To top it off, you are an amazing father.”
“And with no help from you.”
“Oh mijo, it’s all because of me. I made you strong. I made you smart.”
“You made me a mess. Left me with broken shards to piece back together.”
“But I gave you the tools to do it.”
“If you’re here to get a thank you, you're going to be wildly disappointed when you end up unconscious in a hospital bed.”
I rush off away from my father, and towards the gift shop. I walk inside, my mind still clouded by my rage. I lower Bash to his feet, and he quickly takes off towards a wall of hoodies. I breathe slowly, inhaling and exhaling heavily as I slowly bring myself together.
“Hey kid, so what animal did you and the shit machine go see?”
“A jackass.”
Lou stands puzzled for a second.
“You went to see the donkeys? Why? Of all the animals to see in a zoo, and you go look at farm animals? Jesus Christ. Come on, grab the boy and let's go look at those penguins.”
I follow behind Lou, as Bash squirms in my arms, his gaze jumping from one exciting thing to the next. My mind continues to wander back to the encounter with my father. He looked so pitiful standing there. Like he truly regretted it all, but too little too late. I’ve done fine without him, and I plan to keep that going.
“So, any plans for Nickleman?”
Lou breaks me from my train of thought, bringing me back to reality.
“Beat him.”
“Not gonna choke like any other time you fight a friend?”
“Charlie is a good guy. Well, maybe not ‘good’, but he makes me laugh. Yet he’s standing in my way.”
“So just like that, Brotherhood goes out the window.”
“The man is sick and depraved. Once he's in that ring and the bell rings, it doesn’t matter who’s in the other corner.”
Lou nods as we walk into the penguin exhibit. Bash’s smile grows two-fold as he spots the little flightless birds swimming through the glass. He claps his hands together in excitement as he wiggles himself free. His feet patter as he approaches the glass.
“He’s a good kid. I just want you to know, whatever other shit you’ve been going through, you’re a great father. I’m proud of you.”
I feel a tear build in my eye, before I blink it away.
“Thanks Lou”