Post by Gilbert on Feb 17, 2023 19:07:58 GMT -5
We join our two heroes at a museum at an Ancient Greece exhibit. Gilbert is a big fan of history (amongst other nerdy things of course) so is loving learning and reading. Max? Surprisingly, Max is interested too, but then the Ancient Greeks did love their wars and battles now, didn’t they?
Gilbert: Isn’t this fun, Max?
Max: I’d rather be punching someone’s head in, but y’know that Ares guy sounds cool.
Gilbert: Trust you to head straight for the bit about the Greek God of WAR Max.
Max: Hey, he’s the only interesting one. No doubt the one that I can completely agree with.
Gilbert: Yeah. Right.
Max: So… If we’ve got the Greek Gods next in the tournament then what the hell are we doing here, Gilly?
Gilbert: Gilbert. I thought this might provide us with some insight on how to defeat the Greek Gods, silly. It’s prep work. Homework if you will.
Max: Look buddy. I know YOU are a fan of homework and extra credit and all that bullshit, but I never was into that. You know?
Gilbert: Yes. I’m sure you were more about getting into fights. I’m sure.
Max: School made the perfect battleground. There was always someone bigger than you, buddy.
Gilbert: Like prison?
Max: Yeah, like prison. How the fuck did you know that I went to prison?!
Gilbert: I didn’t. I just assumed.
Max: Why?
Gilbert: Why?! Because you’re Violence Personified, Max. The-the very e-embodiment of it! It’s a good job that you have wrestling as an outlet these days.
Max scoffs but nods his head anyway.
Max: Alright, whatever.
Max wanders over to the exhibit where Ares, the Greek God of War stands.
Max: Y’see Gilly? THIS! This is my guy. Look at how many weapons that fucker is holding! Swords, Axes, bows…. The lot man. Can you imagine if that fucker was holding something like an AK47 or an M16 or something like that?! Guy would be unstoppable!
Gilbert: I-I think he was unstoppable anyway. He was… you know, a-a God.
Max reads through the Gods on the board in the room.
Max: Hey, Gilly.
Gilbert: I-it’s GILBERT.
Max: That’s what I said. Gilly.
Gilbert sighs and walks over to Max.
Gilbert: What?
Max: Where’s Kratos?
Gilbert: Huh?
Max: You know, the guy who defeated Ares and became the new God of War. He had that videogame named after him. What was it called?
Gilbert: Um… God of War?
Max: Yeah, Kratos the new God of War. That video game. Jeez, keep up Gilly. What was that game called?
Gilbert: God of War!!
Max: That’s what I just said… what is the game about Kratos called?!!
Gilbert: No, I think the game was called God. Of. War…Max!
Max: Doesn’t seem right… I’m sure it was called Kratos or somethin’.
Suddenly a security guard comes strolling over which Gilbert sees before Max (luckily. After all, what happened the last time Max Rotten bumped into some security guards?) That’s right. Gilbert puts his arm around Max, turning Max away from the oncoming security guard.
Security: Hey, excuse me, boys?
Gilbert tries to pull Max away but Max turns his head spotting the security guard. Too late.
Max: What the hell do you want, old man?
Security: I am sorry but you two are being rather loud. I’m going to have to ask you to keep it down, I’m afraid.
Max: Fu-
Before Max can finish, Gilbert puts his hand over Max’s mouth and interrupts.
Gilbert: Er… yes. Our apologies, sir. We were just leaving.
Max: We were?
Gilbert: Yes. We were. Come on, Max. It’s lunch time.
The camera fades out.
======================
When the camera fades in again the scene opens to a huge mountain where OCW’s Zeus is sitting atop holding a lightning bolt.
Zeus: Ahh! Yet another fine day up here on Mount OCWympus! I say, Gilmes!
Suddenly a scrawny, thin god with wing-tipped shoes appears with a piece of paper in his hands along with a pencil. (It’s Hermes technically but up here on OCWympus, he looks like Gilbert).
Gilmes: Y-yes your Zeusness?
Zeus: I want you to get a message to the OCW God of War Max-res. Tell him, that if he wants to face his Father and Uncle in battle, then he must find a partner.
Gilmes: Y-yes Zeus.
Gilmes then flies away to look for Max-res the OCWympus God of War. He eventually finds Max-res throwing various weapons at a target.
Gilmes: Max-res!
Max-res: What in the name of Hades’ underworld do you want, Gilmes?
Gilmes: I bring word from the guy upstairs.
Max-res: Thor?
Gilmes: What? No…
Max-res: Odin?
Gilmes: No. Zeus!
Max-res: Oh. Well what does the Corey Feldman looking asswipe want?
Gilmes: Who is C-.... you know what? Never mind. He said to tell you that if you wish to face him and Hades in battle then you need to find a partner.
Max-res: A partner?! I’m the Mother-Flerken OCW God of War. Forget it.
Gilmes: No, no. You’re right. I’ll just go and inform him that the battle is off. Because you obviously forfeit of course.
Max-res: Gilmes! Gilmes wait…. Wait!
Max-res suddenly stops what he is doing and violently turns towards Gilmes. Gilmes instinctively cowers behind a rock. Once he sees that no axes, swords or flaming arrows are coming his way, he peeks his head out from behind the rock only to find Max-res staring at him.
Gilmes: Yes?
Max-res: Why don’t you be my partner for the battle?
Gilmes: M-me? Uh… no thank-you. I like my job as messenger to the Gods.
Max-res starts to stroll over to Gilmes.
Max-res: Come now, Gilmes… is that all you want for the rest of your l-......all eternity? That’s a long time after all.
Gilmes: Y-yes. As I said, I like my job as the Messenger of the Gods.
Max-res then spends some time talking to Gilmes putting his arm around him and after a while, Gilmes actually comes around to Max-res’s way of thinking.
Gilmes: So what you’re saying is if I team up with you in battle, I can become the new Head God of OCWympus?
Max-res: That’s right! You go and tell Zeus that you’ve had a change of heart. No-one is going to push you around anymore. Are they?
Gilmes: Uh…n-no.
Max-res: Oh, come on now, Gilmes! Say it with some conviction!
Gilmes: N-no!
Max-res: And who knows? Marcera might see you at last. That’s what you have always wanted right?
Gilmes: Marcera: Zeus’s wife?! Are you crazy?
Max-res: I’m the God of War, kid. I’ve gotta be a little crazy. Comes with the territory. Now…. Go!
Max-res slaps Gilmes on the back and Gilmes flies away, back to Mount OCWympus where Zeus is still sitting on his throne.
Zeus: Ah, Gilmes! What news of Max-res? Will he join me on the battlefield with someone backing him? Does he have a partner?
Gilmes: H-he does Sire, yes he does. I can confirm that Max-res does indeed have a partner for the battle against you and Hades.
Zeus smirks and rubs his hands together eagerly.
Zeus: Well Gilmes? Who is the poor soul that is to face us?
Gilmes: Before I tell you that, Sire… I have a confession to make.
Zeus: Speak!
Gilmes: I am in love with Marcera. I am going to be facing you and Hades on the battlefield and partnering with Max-res! A-and you know what else?! We’re putting an end to your tyrannical rule, here on Mount OCWympus Zeus!
Zeus: WHAT?! YOU?! Explain yourself, Gilmes!
Gilmes: I’ve been talking with Max-res. He’s come up with some very good points as to why I should be the one ruling Mount OCWympus. Not you. You’re a fraud, a charlatan! A-a sham…. And on the battlefield Zeus Gilmes and Max-res are going to show just how fake you and your brother Hades really are. You see, I was content being your messenger, I was… but then I started to think about how you never actually paid me or rewarded me in any way for delivering your messages! Well, no more! Here Zeus, is where your rule of Mount OCWympus comes to an end. For g-good.
Zeus: You know not of what you speak Gilmes… You’ve gone mad.
Gilmes: N-no. For the first time, I think clearer than I’ve ever thought. We’ll see you on the battlefield!
The camera fades out again and upon fading back in, Max is walking over to Gilbert who appears to be daydreaming. He slaps Gilbert round the head to bring him back to the real world.
Gilbert: Ow! What was that for?!
Max: Because it was funny. And you looked like you were spacing out.
Gilbert: Oh I was having such a lovely dream….
Max: Yeah? What was it about?
Max says as he shoves a hamburger into his mouth. Gilbert puts a straw into a nearby juicebox and slurps.
Gilbert: We were taking over Outsiders. And all we had to do was beat Zeus and Hades.
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Word Count: 1,506
Gilbert: Isn’t this fun, Max?
Max: I’d rather be punching someone’s head in, but y’know that Ares guy sounds cool.
Gilbert: Trust you to head straight for the bit about the Greek God of WAR Max.
Max: Hey, he’s the only interesting one. No doubt the one that I can completely agree with.
Gilbert: Yeah. Right.
Max: So… If we’ve got the Greek Gods next in the tournament then what the hell are we doing here, Gilly?
Gilbert: Gilbert. I thought this might provide us with some insight on how to defeat the Greek Gods, silly. It’s prep work. Homework if you will.
Max: Look buddy. I know YOU are a fan of homework and extra credit and all that bullshit, but I never was into that. You know?
Gilbert: Yes. I’m sure you were more about getting into fights. I’m sure.
Max: School made the perfect battleground. There was always someone bigger than you, buddy.
Gilbert: Like prison?
Max: Yeah, like prison. How the fuck did you know that I went to prison?!
Gilbert: I didn’t. I just assumed.
Max: Why?
Gilbert: Why?! Because you’re Violence Personified, Max. The-the very e-embodiment of it! It’s a good job that you have wrestling as an outlet these days.
Max scoffs but nods his head anyway.
Max: Alright, whatever.
Max wanders over to the exhibit where Ares, the Greek God of War stands.
Max: Y’see Gilly? THIS! This is my guy. Look at how many weapons that fucker is holding! Swords, Axes, bows…. The lot man. Can you imagine if that fucker was holding something like an AK47 or an M16 or something like that?! Guy would be unstoppable!
Gilbert: I-I think he was unstoppable anyway. He was… you know, a-a God.
Max reads through the Gods on the board in the room.
Max: Hey, Gilly.
Gilbert: I-it’s GILBERT.
Max: That’s what I said. Gilly.
Gilbert sighs and walks over to Max.
Gilbert: What?
Max: Where’s Kratos?
Gilbert: Huh?
Max: You know, the guy who defeated Ares and became the new God of War. He had that videogame named after him. What was it called?
Gilbert: Um… God of War?
Max: Yeah, Kratos the new God of War. That video game. Jeez, keep up Gilly. What was that game called?
Gilbert: God of War!!
Max: That’s what I just said… what is the game about Kratos called?!!
Gilbert: No, I think the game was called God. Of. War…Max!
Max: Doesn’t seem right… I’m sure it was called Kratos or somethin’.
Suddenly a security guard comes strolling over which Gilbert sees before Max (luckily. After all, what happened the last time Max Rotten bumped into some security guards?) That’s right. Gilbert puts his arm around Max, turning Max away from the oncoming security guard.
Security: Hey, excuse me, boys?
Gilbert tries to pull Max away but Max turns his head spotting the security guard. Too late.
Max: What the hell do you want, old man?
Security: I am sorry but you two are being rather loud. I’m going to have to ask you to keep it down, I’m afraid.
Max: Fu-
Before Max can finish, Gilbert puts his hand over Max’s mouth and interrupts.
Gilbert: Er… yes. Our apologies, sir. We were just leaving.
Max: We were?
Gilbert: Yes. We were. Come on, Max. It’s lunch time.
The camera fades out.
======================
When the camera fades in again the scene opens to a huge mountain where OCW’s Zeus is sitting atop holding a lightning bolt.
Zeus: Ahh! Yet another fine day up here on Mount OCWympus! I say, Gilmes!
Suddenly a scrawny, thin god with wing-tipped shoes appears with a piece of paper in his hands along with a pencil. (It’s Hermes technically but up here on OCWympus, he looks like Gilbert).
Gilmes: Y-yes your Zeusness?
Zeus: I want you to get a message to the OCW God of War Max-res. Tell him, that if he wants to face his Father and Uncle in battle, then he must find a partner.
Gilmes: Y-yes Zeus.
Gilmes then flies away to look for Max-res the OCWympus God of War. He eventually finds Max-res throwing various weapons at a target.
Gilmes: Max-res!
Max-res: What in the name of Hades’ underworld do you want, Gilmes?
Gilmes: I bring word from the guy upstairs.
Max-res: Thor?
Gilmes: What? No…
Max-res: Odin?
Gilmes: No. Zeus!
Max-res: Oh. Well what does the Corey Feldman looking asswipe want?
Gilmes: Who is C-.... you know what? Never mind. He said to tell you that if you wish to face him and Hades in battle then you need to find a partner.
Max-res: A partner?! I’m the Mother-Flerken OCW God of War. Forget it.
Gilmes: No, no. You’re right. I’ll just go and inform him that the battle is off. Because you obviously forfeit of course.
Max-res: Gilmes! Gilmes wait…. Wait!
Max-res suddenly stops what he is doing and violently turns towards Gilmes. Gilmes instinctively cowers behind a rock. Once he sees that no axes, swords or flaming arrows are coming his way, he peeks his head out from behind the rock only to find Max-res staring at him.
Gilmes: Yes?
Max-res: Why don’t you be my partner for the battle?
Gilmes: M-me? Uh… no thank-you. I like my job as messenger to the Gods.
Max-res starts to stroll over to Gilmes.
Max-res: Come now, Gilmes… is that all you want for the rest of your l-......all eternity? That’s a long time after all.
Gilmes: Y-yes. As I said, I like my job as the Messenger of the Gods.
Max-res then spends some time talking to Gilmes putting his arm around him and after a while, Gilmes actually comes around to Max-res’s way of thinking.
Gilmes: So what you’re saying is if I team up with you in battle, I can become the new Head God of OCWympus?
Max-res: That’s right! You go and tell Zeus that you’ve had a change of heart. No-one is going to push you around anymore. Are they?
Gilmes: Uh…n-no.
Max-res: Oh, come on now, Gilmes! Say it with some conviction!
Gilmes: N-no!
Max-res: And who knows? Marcera might see you at last. That’s what you have always wanted right?
Gilmes: Marcera: Zeus’s wife?! Are you crazy?
Max-res: I’m the God of War, kid. I’ve gotta be a little crazy. Comes with the territory. Now…. Go!
Max-res slaps Gilmes on the back and Gilmes flies away, back to Mount OCWympus where Zeus is still sitting on his throne.
Zeus: Ah, Gilmes! What news of Max-res? Will he join me on the battlefield with someone backing him? Does he have a partner?
Gilmes: H-he does Sire, yes he does. I can confirm that Max-res does indeed have a partner for the battle against you and Hades.
Zeus smirks and rubs his hands together eagerly.
Zeus: Well Gilmes? Who is the poor soul that is to face us?
Gilmes: Before I tell you that, Sire… I have a confession to make.
Zeus: Speak!
Gilmes: I am in love with Marcera. I am going to be facing you and Hades on the battlefield and partnering with Max-res! A-and you know what else?! We’re putting an end to your tyrannical rule, here on Mount OCWympus Zeus!
Zeus: WHAT?! YOU?! Explain yourself, Gilmes!
Gilmes: I’ve been talking with Max-res. He’s come up with some very good points as to why I should be the one ruling Mount OCWympus. Not you. You’re a fraud, a charlatan! A-a sham…. And on the battlefield Zeus Gilmes and Max-res are going to show just how fake you and your brother Hades really are. You see, I was content being your messenger, I was… but then I started to think about how you never actually paid me or rewarded me in any way for delivering your messages! Well, no more! Here Zeus, is where your rule of Mount OCWympus comes to an end. For g-good.
Zeus: You know not of what you speak Gilmes… You’ve gone mad.
Gilmes: N-no. For the first time, I think clearer than I’ve ever thought. We’ll see you on the battlefield!
The camera fades out again and upon fading back in, Max is walking over to Gilbert who appears to be daydreaming. He slaps Gilbert round the head to bring him back to the real world.
Gilbert: Ow! What was that for?!
Max: Because it was funny. And you looked like you were spacing out.
Gilbert: Oh I was having such a lovely dream….
Max: Yeah? What was it about?
Max says as he shoves a hamburger into his mouth. Gilbert puts a straw into a nearby juicebox and slurps.
Gilbert: We were taking over Outsiders. And all we had to do was beat Zeus and Hades.
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Word Count: 1,506