Post by Dylan Thomas on Aug 11, 2022 11:03:11 GMT -5
Time. It’s a funny old thing. Two and a half years ago in GCWA, Mike Zybala and Dylan Thomas were kicking each other’s heads in over the X-Division Title. Yet there was always one man uniting the two of us - no matter how much we tried to pull away from each other. Lord Allton. With Lord Allton being one of my oldest friends and the crown jewel of Zybala’s Outsiders Wrestling, it was inevitable that the three of us came together over time. And over time I came to realise that Mike Zybala wasn’t that bad of a guy.
Back then, if you’d have said to me, ‘Dylan, almost three years from now you’re going to be teaming up with Mike Zybala for OCW’s Margarita Mix,’ I would have more than likely shoved a fist down your throat. But that’s the funny thing about time… it has a funny way of working things out. But it all started on an episode of OCW Piledriver. One of GCWA’s most hated became one of OCW’s most beloved - thanks to an incredibly unhinged wrestling janitor - and who was there when all the dust cleared? Mike Zybala. Mike and I bonded over the fact that said wrestling janitor was making both our lives Hell.
Two of GCWA’s greatest rivals became two of OCW’s greatest friends.
Zybala: What are you doing, dictating a written memoir?
Dylan: What? No, I’m doing the promo - remember? It’s what we agreed.
Zybala: Right, yeah of course.
Dylan: Anyway…
Just a few weeks ago, I was part of team ‘Old School’ of OCW, fighting for the honour of OCW against team ‘New School’. But in truth that is what myself and Mike Zybala have always been whether it was in GCWA or OCW - we were seen as the benchmark. Look at Veronica Strader. Upon her return I was her first true feud for her Trans-Atlantic championship. Hell the guys with no belts have got to do something once in a while right?
Zybala: Hey! I won the Tag Team Titles with TLS and beat you for GCWA’s X-Division title!
Dylan: Yeah but that’s not… I wasn’t saying that.
Zybala: What were you saying then?
Dylan: I meant that we’ve been in OCW this long - you longer than me of course - and only recently have you ever won a title. Yet here you are, regardless, week in and week out delivering those Superkicks of Justice. We Mike are the bar of OCW, the benchmark of OCW. Either recognised as it or not. That’s what I was getting at.
Zybala: I guess you’re right. I see now.
Which brings me rather nicely to the Mix. OCW’s famous Margarita Mix. The most famous and anticipated wrestling event of the summer. Fuck everything else - it’s the Margarita Mix that matters, much like OCW as a whole. OCW is the number one fed out there right now. It’s where people come from miles around to join our roster. Hell to that end Lord Allton is from the UK of course. When Zybala and I square up against our opponents, you better believe it that we’re going all the way. Zybala and I are winning the Mix I -
Dylan: What on Earth are you doing?
Zybala comes sauntering in dressed like CJ O’Donnell. Dylan watches aghast.
Zybala: Fook! That’s right! Ya see John Nash Strader and CJ O’Donnell when Dylan and I head into the Margareeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeta Mix
Dylan: [You mean ‘Margarita’]
Zybala: [Sssh! I’m doing a thing]
Dylan shrugs and allows Zybala to just get on with things.
Zybala: When we head into the Mix, we are going to kick you both in the fookin’ skull. We’re going to then move on to round two while leaving the two of you in the dust.
Dylan: And…
I’m just wondering Strader….. But are all of you like some weird cult or something? Did Mommy and Daddy Strader pop you all out like rabbits? Everytime I turn around there seems to be more of you. But I’ve gotta ask you Mr. Strader…how many personalities are in your head? Or is that just a Ronnie/Vicky thing?
Zybala: Dude…
Dylan: Hey… the people have a right to know…
Zybala: Yeah, but Ronnie and Victoria are separate entities these days.
Dylan: Hell, I know that….
But regardless of all this… Mike Zybala and Dylan Thomas truly are the heart and soul of Online Championship Wrestling. And we’ll show you both just why we’re going to win this thing. Who else is there…? Ah yeah… the ‘reigning and defending’ Margarita Mix Champion of last year. With TK. So lemme ask you TK…are you going in as Thunder Knuckles this time or are you donning the mask as El Knuckle? I can never keep up with you and who you are every week. You should have found yourself a better partner Dolly, I have a feeling that TK is going to screw you over the first chance he gets. PIC and TLS…
Suddenly Zybala comes in wearing his TLS2 mask. He then tosses a wig to Dylan.
Dylan: What’s this?
Zybala: Put it on.
Dylan: It looks like a soccer mom’s hair.
Zybala: Yeah, well if I’m TLS right now then you’ve naturally got to be PIC right?
Dylan exasperates.
Dylan: I suppose so.
The Lost Zybala just stands there in his Rorschach mask tilting his head as Dylan puts on the wig and continues with his promo.
I have to admit when I first heard about your pairing, I was excited for the two of you. PIC we had a fine match at Reformation. Although neither one of us came out victorious in that bout, I like to think that we took each other to the limit in that match. But of course this time it’s different. This time it’s the Mix. Now you admittedly do have one of the greatest in the business on your side. But that does not and will not change the fact that Zybala and are going to go through you both to come out victorious in the Mix. However TLS I have a message for you personally. I have all the respect in the world for what you have accomplished in the wrestling business but I know it was you that knocked Gary Nelson into Lissandra just a few weeks ago and at the Mix I’m going to make sure you pay for it if we meet in that ring.
It was an honour for me to team with you, Bob and BRIM just a few weeks ago but this is different. Now you have made an enemy out of Dylan Thomas and I’m sorry but this is one of the most stupidest decisions that you have come up with. I hope TLS that you make it through to facing us in the Mix - it’s just a shame that that is where your journey comes to an end. Oh and TLS… I saw your promo for the Mix. I don’t know where you got the idea that I was British. That’s Lord Allton. I’m American.
Zybala: Wait, he thought you were British?
Dylan: He did, indeed.
Zybala: How the hell did he mess that up? I’ve told him before that it’s only Allton from England.
Dylan: Heh. Well it doesn’t matter. What in the blue hell are you doing now?
Zybala has changed costumes yet again. This time it seems as though he is dressed as a Roman gladiator. Claudius Augustus would no doubt be proud. He throws a costume at Dylan.
Zybala: Here.
Dylan: Seriously?
Zybala: I am Zybalaclese. You are Dylancus. We are the two defenders of the fair realm of OCWano.
Dylan(cus): You’ve lost your mind bro.
Zybala(clese): Just….just do this for me would you?
Dylan heads off to change while Zybalaclese takes over.
Fair opponents of the Mix… I have been called the Heart and Soul [sorry TLS] of our great company for some time now and it is easy to see why. I’ve been around for fucking ages with only just recently having something to show for my hard work - the tag team titles. I work my ass off for this company - and Outsiders and still all of you treat Mike Zybala like a goddamn laughing stock. Well no more! Because it doesn’t matter just who Dylan and I face first, second, third….
Dylan returns dressed in his Roman Gladiator get up. Dylan then interrupts Zybala’s tirade.
Eighty-fifth.
Zybala: Exactly.
Dylan: No, the results will be the same. Everyone in this Mix, except Mike and I seemingly have been thrown together with no rhyme or reason. All of you probably hate each other behind the scenes. But not Mike and I.
Zybala: With the exception probably of Bob and Curt.
Dylan: Curt is in this thing?
Zybala: Yeah.
Dylan: How? He’s like 457.
Regardless, while it’s long true that Mike and I didn’t get on in GCWA or indeed the early parts of OCW’s re-emergence three years ago… times do indeed change. The Mix is that one time of the year when we can let loose and show each other what we have got. Like true gladiators in an arena. Claudius, how does it feel to actually be one of the competitors for once instead of lording over the action from your throne? Or am I getting you confused with Gladiator the Movie again? It doesn’t matter. You may have Mark Storm backing you up, but will he be here for the Mix? Since he likes to treat OCW as a revolving door almost as much as PerZag does.
Does anyone remember PerZag? No? Understandable. He claims to be ‘worthy’ but unlike Mike and I, doesn’t treat OCW itself in the same way.
Zybala(clese): [You’re getting off track].
Right. So who else is in this thing…? Cypher and Sahara Duke? The Trans-Atlantic Champion I can understand, he’s been on a tear recently. But is the majority owner’s wife allowed to be in this thing? Isn’t that a bit of a conflict of interest? Ally Cally and Ricky Rodriguez. So Ally has to team up with someone that isn’t a Paramount team mate! And what happens if it comes down to Ally vs CJ? Interesting thought, but that would mean that CJ and JNS would beat Mike and I in order for that to happen.
Seb? Sebastian Stone is returning? I never thought I would see the day! I thought you would be as welcomed back as much as Peter Vaughn and Pryde would be.
Zybala: I don’t think….
Dylan: But it says Seb.
Zybala: It has to be a different Seb.
Ray-Ray Nelson! I’ve gotta ask… how’s your face? Given that I totally fucked it up the last time that we met. You’re teaming with that cowboy dude right? What’s his name?
Zybala: John Wayne?
Dylan: No.
Zybala: Clint Eastwood?
Dylan: No… Bret something.
Zybala: Bret Hart wasn’t a cowboy.
Nelson I don’t remember who your partner is for this match but I damn sure as hell remember you. As you no doubt remember me, bashing your face in the last time that we were in the ring together. And the result will be the same again, that you can be sure of Ball Ball and Crash Rodriguez - Another Rodriguez! I had no idea that that surname was so popular. Ball Ball! Do you know my name now? If not, you will know it by the end of the Margarita Mix.
Zybala: There’s also Cass Baumer and Dane Preston.
Wasn’t Dane Preston an enhancement talent? In fact, isn’t he one of the ones you picked up for Outsiders? Cass, I’m telling you now, if you’ve got him as a partner then you aren’t getting far in the Mix. What, was Tony the Spider busy or something?
Everybody in the Mix. Understand this: Mike and my wins at the Mix are going to be nothing short of Perfection, Personified!
Zybala SUPERKICKS the screen and the camera fades.
Word Count 2000 exactly.
Back then, if you’d have said to me, ‘Dylan, almost three years from now you’re going to be teaming up with Mike Zybala for OCW’s Margarita Mix,’ I would have more than likely shoved a fist down your throat. But that’s the funny thing about time… it has a funny way of working things out. But it all started on an episode of OCW Piledriver. One of GCWA’s most hated became one of OCW’s most beloved - thanks to an incredibly unhinged wrestling janitor - and who was there when all the dust cleared? Mike Zybala. Mike and I bonded over the fact that said wrestling janitor was making both our lives Hell.
Two of GCWA’s greatest rivals became two of OCW’s greatest friends.
Zybala: What are you doing, dictating a written memoir?
Dylan: What? No, I’m doing the promo - remember? It’s what we agreed.
Zybala: Right, yeah of course.
Dylan: Anyway…
Just a few weeks ago, I was part of team ‘Old School’ of OCW, fighting for the honour of OCW against team ‘New School’. But in truth that is what myself and Mike Zybala have always been whether it was in GCWA or OCW - we were seen as the benchmark. Look at Veronica Strader. Upon her return I was her first true feud for her Trans-Atlantic championship. Hell the guys with no belts have got to do something once in a while right?
Zybala: Hey! I won the Tag Team Titles with TLS and beat you for GCWA’s X-Division title!
Dylan: Yeah but that’s not… I wasn’t saying that.
Zybala: What were you saying then?
Dylan: I meant that we’ve been in OCW this long - you longer than me of course - and only recently have you ever won a title. Yet here you are, regardless, week in and week out delivering those Superkicks of Justice. We Mike are the bar of OCW, the benchmark of OCW. Either recognised as it or not. That’s what I was getting at.
Zybala: I guess you’re right. I see now.
Which brings me rather nicely to the Mix. OCW’s famous Margarita Mix. The most famous and anticipated wrestling event of the summer. Fuck everything else - it’s the Margarita Mix that matters, much like OCW as a whole. OCW is the number one fed out there right now. It’s where people come from miles around to join our roster. Hell to that end Lord Allton is from the UK of course. When Zybala and I square up against our opponents, you better believe it that we’re going all the way. Zybala and I are winning the Mix I -
Dylan: What on Earth are you doing?
Zybala comes sauntering in dressed like CJ O’Donnell. Dylan watches aghast.
Zybala: Fook! That’s right! Ya see John Nash Strader and CJ O’Donnell when Dylan and I head into the Margareeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeta Mix
Dylan: [You mean ‘Margarita’]
Zybala: [Sssh! I’m doing a thing]
Dylan shrugs and allows Zybala to just get on with things.
Zybala: When we head into the Mix, we are going to kick you both in the fookin’ skull. We’re going to then move on to round two while leaving the two of you in the dust.
Dylan: And…
I’m just wondering Strader….. But are all of you like some weird cult or something? Did Mommy and Daddy Strader pop you all out like rabbits? Everytime I turn around there seems to be more of you. But I’ve gotta ask you Mr. Strader…how many personalities are in your head? Or is that just a Ronnie/Vicky thing?
Zybala: Dude…
Dylan: Hey… the people have a right to know…
Zybala: Yeah, but Ronnie and Victoria are separate entities these days.
Dylan: Hell, I know that….
But regardless of all this… Mike Zybala and Dylan Thomas truly are the heart and soul of Online Championship Wrestling. And we’ll show you both just why we’re going to win this thing. Who else is there…? Ah yeah… the ‘reigning and defending’ Margarita Mix Champion of last year. With TK. So lemme ask you TK…are you going in as Thunder Knuckles this time or are you donning the mask as El Knuckle? I can never keep up with you and who you are every week. You should have found yourself a better partner Dolly, I have a feeling that TK is going to screw you over the first chance he gets. PIC and TLS…
Suddenly Zybala comes in wearing his TLS2 mask. He then tosses a wig to Dylan.
Dylan: What’s this?
Zybala: Put it on.
Dylan: It looks like a soccer mom’s hair.
Zybala: Yeah, well if I’m TLS right now then you’ve naturally got to be PIC right?
Dylan exasperates.
Dylan: I suppose so.
The Lost Zybala just stands there in his Rorschach mask tilting his head as Dylan puts on the wig and continues with his promo.
I have to admit when I first heard about your pairing, I was excited for the two of you. PIC we had a fine match at Reformation. Although neither one of us came out victorious in that bout, I like to think that we took each other to the limit in that match. But of course this time it’s different. This time it’s the Mix. Now you admittedly do have one of the greatest in the business on your side. But that does not and will not change the fact that Zybala and are going to go through you both to come out victorious in the Mix. However TLS I have a message for you personally. I have all the respect in the world for what you have accomplished in the wrestling business but I know it was you that knocked Gary Nelson into Lissandra just a few weeks ago and at the Mix I’m going to make sure you pay for it if we meet in that ring.
It was an honour for me to team with you, Bob and BRIM just a few weeks ago but this is different. Now you have made an enemy out of Dylan Thomas and I’m sorry but this is one of the most stupidest decisions that you have come up with. I hope TLS that you make it through to facing us in the Mix - it’s just a shame that that is where your journey comes to an end. Oh and TLS… I saw your promo for the Mix. I don’t know where you got the idea that I was British. That’s Lord Allton. I’m American.
Zybala: Wait, he thought you were British?
Dylan: He did, indeed.
Zybala: How the hell did he mess that up? I’ve told him before that it’s only Allton from England.
Dylan: Heh. Well it doesn’t matter. What in the blue hell are you doing now?
Zybala has changed costumes yet again. This time it seems as though he is dressed as a Roman gladiator. Claudius Augustus would no doubt be proud. He throws a costume at Dylan.
Zybala: Here.
Dylan: Seriously?
Zybala: I am Zybalaclese. You are Dylancus. We are the two defenders of the fair realm of OCWano.
Dylan(cus): You’ve lost your mind bro.
Zybala(clese): Just….just do this for me would you?
Dylan heads off to change while Zybalaclese takes over.
Fair opponents of the Mix… I have been called the Heart and Soul [sorry TLS] of our great company for some time now and it is easy to see why. I’ve been around for fucking ages with only just recently having something to show for my hard work - the tag team titles. I work my ass off for this company - and Outsiders and still all of you treat Mike Zybala like a goddamn laughing stock. Well no more! Because it doesn’t matter just who Dylan and I face first, second, third….
Dylan returns dressed in his Roman Gladiator get up. Dylan then interrupts Zybala’s tirade.
Eighty-fifth.
Zybala: Exactly.
Dylan: No, the results will be the same. Everyone in this Mix, except Mike and I seemingly have been thrown together with no rhyme or reason. All of you probably hate each other behind the scenes. But not Mike and I.
Zybala: With the exception probably of Bob and Curt.
Dylan: Curt is in this thing?
Zybala: Yeah.
Dylan: How? He’s like 457.
Regardless, while it’s long true that Mike and I didn’t get on in GCWA or indeed the early parts of OCW’s re-emergence three years ago… times do indeed change. The Mix is that one time of the year when we can let loose and show each other what we have got. Like true gladiators in an arena. Claudius, how does it feel to actually be one of the competitors for once instead of lording over the action from your throne? Or am I getting you confused with Gladiator the Movie again? It doesn’t matter. You may have Mark Storm backing you up, but will he be here for the Mix? Since he likes to treat OCW as a revolving door almost as much as PerZag does.
Does anyone remember PerZag? No? Understandable. He claims to be ‘worthy’ but unlike Mike and I, doesn’t treat OCW itself in the same way.
Zybala(clese): [You’re getting off track].
Right. So who else is in this thing…? Cypher and Sahara Duke? The Trans-Atlantic Champion I can understand, he’s been on a tear recently. But is the majority owner’s wife allowed to be in this thing? Isn’t that a bit of a conflict of interest? Ally Cally and Ricky Rodriguez. So Ally has to team up with someone that isn’t a Paramount team mate! And what happens if it comes down to Ally vs CJ? Interesting thought, but that would mean that CJ and JNS would beat Mike and I in order for that to happen.
Seb? Sebastian Stone is returning? I never thought I would see the day! I thought you would be as welcomed back as much as Peter Vaughn and Pryde would be.
Zybala: I don’t think….
Dylan: But it says Seb.
Zybala: It has to be a different Seb.
Ray-Ray Nelson! I’ve gotta ask… how’s your face? Given that I totally fucked it up the last time that we met. You’re teaming with that cowboy dude right? What’s his name?
Zybala: John Wayne?
Dylan: No.
Zybala: Clint Eastwood?
Dylan: No… Bret something.
Zybala: Bret Hart wasn’t a cowboy.
Nelson I don’t remember who your partner is for this match but I damn sure as hell remember you. As you no doubt remember me, bashing your face in the last time that we were in the ring together. And the result will be the same again, that you can be sure of Ball Ball and Crash Rodriguez - Another Rodriguez! I had no idea that that surname was so popular. Ball Ball! Do you know my name now? If not, you will know it by the end of the Margarita Mix.
Zybala: There’s also Cass Baumer and Dane Preston.
Wasn’t Dane Preston an enhancement talent? In fact, isn’t he one of the ones you picked up for Outsiders? Cass, I’m telling you now, if you’ve got him as a partner then you aren’t getting far in the Mix. What, was Tony the Spider busy or something?
Everybody in the Mix. Understand this: Mike and my wins at the Mix are going to be nothing short of Perfection, Personified!
Zybala SUPERKICKS the screen and the camera fades.
Word Count 2000 exactly.